We slept many hours. Summer, as usual, had many more than me. I woke up first, but we got out of bed around the same time. Power flickered overnight, so I had to start my computer up again. Shortly after I got it back up, power flickered again and I ended up losing all of my Tabs Outliner history. That extension has been critical for any projects I’ve had to research, so I spent literally the entire day trying to recover from that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Summer made brunch for us out of some sausage and eggs we had in the refrigerator. Eaddie left. A new shower head was delivered, so I got that installed. I spent more time trying to recovery my Tabs Outliner, but eventually gave up and rolled back to my last good backup over a month ago. By that time, I needed to take Muad’Dib out for a run. I also wanted to have a good dinner, so I took the Pint X to my parents’ house and warmed up the leftover fish soup while my parents were out watering the plants.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Afterward we rode straight back home. I never could get the Pint over 10mph, which seemed strange. I guess I never really felt pushback, but it just felt like it wasn’t accelerating any further, and I didn’t want to nosedive. It didn’t help that it wouldn’t even make it straight up the driveway without nosediving.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When we got back in, I happened to notice that Summer put some parts of the coffee maker into the dishwasher that weren’t dishwasher safe. I didn’t feel like I blew up at her, but I still had to dig things out of the running dishwasher and clean up the mess. Two components were plainly labeled as not dishwasher-safe. She also left a pretty obvious sticker in place, so that came off in the wash. All of that ultimately lead to a small fight, and I simply couldn’t understand how she could possibly feel like she had any kind of argument.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It’s always simple, stupid stuff, but I don’t know how much more I can stand. I feel like my life was on a steady upward climb before I met her. I was moving upward with my career, and I was cleaning up my home. I let my own home suffer when I started spending most of my time with her at her house. I saw things in her life that I felt like we could improve as a team. Then I allowed the whirlwind of storm damage to my home, my desire to expand my property, and B\u00e1c V\u00e2n’s unexpected death to push me to move into a new home with her. It’s been an absolute freefall from that point forward. I can’t get any traction on any project, I’m constantly frustrated or angry, I don’t feel like I’m respected, and the only thing I can do to provide any happiness for myself is actively making everyone else unhappy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Maybe I’ll figure it out tomorrow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Why am I here?<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" We slept many hours. Summer, as usual, had many more than me. I woke up first, but we got out of bed […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[45,56,29,66,95],"class_list":["post-10108","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorised","tag-anger-management","tag-disappointment","tag-family","tag-frustration","tag-onewheel"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10108","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10108"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10108\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10109,"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10108\/revisions\/10109"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10108"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10108"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/gallopingcow.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10108"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}