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Caturday

Summer made breakfast this morning, and then spent most of the day baking cookies. I went outside a few times to try and acclimate the cat that Eaddie wasn’t babysitting. I even put on some cartoons for it to try and mask the other creepy outside-building sounds. Eaddie left once or twice for a concert at Tech, and I took the Onewheel to my parents’ house to check out the Christmas steaks.

Later in the evening, the three of us watched the first episode of the second season of Loki, and then Eaddie went to spend the night in the outhouse with the cat while Summer and I went to bed.

One of Three, Down

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What’s New, Tom Jones?

Eaddie wanted to cat-sit for a friend, and the best this mean, old man could compromise was to let her keep it in the shed out back. Eli came over, and they went to get it. Summer was finally ready to go do a little shopping today, but that ended up being a bit of chaos. I should have known better than to brave the stores two days before Christmas.

We skipped Harbor Freight because I didn’t have a coupon. We went to Lowe’s to try and find a tree skirt, but they had precious little left. We wandered some more of the store, but didn’t get much. Next was TJ Maxx, which was an absolute zoo. The parking lot was completely full, and the checkout line wrapped toward around and about halfway toward the back of the store. Walmart wasn’t much better, but we made it out with a couple hundred bucks worth of groceries for the week. It took us much longer to get out than in. On the way home, we stopped by the old house to pick up a few more things, including a radiator to warm up the outhouse.

The kids were in and out of the house to tend to the cat while Summer made dinner. She kept telling me the ham wouldn’t take long to heat, but in the end we had cold, slimy ham and lumpy instant potatoes with some of her usual Brussels sprouts. I was able to save the potatoes, but only after everyone else had their food. I’ll have to warm the ham up better the next time we eat it.

Afterward we went out to try and coax the cat out of the corner. Eaddie made a pallet to sleep on, but gave up and came inside. She was upset with me for most of the night because I wouldn’t let her bring the cat inside, so next time there won’t be a compromise.

Always the bad guy.

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Like a Bull in a Chinese Shop

I had a plan today, but that didn’t seem to bother anyone else. Eaddie went to school all day just to hang out, but later said she was trapped in a small room with a dead phone. That sounded a lot like childhood to me. Summer made the two of us cheese and spinach omelets for breakfast, and then she left for the gym while I cleaned up. She ended up having to take a work call in the parking lot, and that was when we lost her to work for the rest of the day.

She spent the afternoon trying to source a Veloster motor, so I went out on the Onewheel. I thought I was doing fairly well, but I got a death-wobble coming down the hill again, and spilled the beans. I tumbled a bit, but not as much as the board, which went end-for-end for nearly the width of the street. I still can’t figure out what went wrong. I was having trouble slowing down, and I don’t know if my ankles just didn’t have the strength to keep the board steady, or if the tire needed to lose a pound of pressure. I’ve always had a little trouble steering on sloped surfaces too.

I came back inside and put tiny ornaments on Eaddie’s little Christmas tree before she got home, and eventually we decided to go to New China for dinner. We ate, I gave an impromptu fortune-speech on wasting kindness, and I shared some malaphors. Then we went straight home for the night.

Eaddie spent a bit of the evening cleaning to make a space for a whole-ass Christmas tree in her room, but then she wanted mine. I told her she could have hers which screamed “CHRISTMAS” in bold, schizophrenic, epileptic lights, because I had a matching pair of the tree I liked, which would bookend the home theater nicely. She claimed the extra 4-inch diameter made the garish tree an impossible fit, and made a fat joke about me not being able to fit through the door opening, so I chased her across the house and then went online to publish the sixth-most embarrassing photo I could find of her.

Summer came out to watch TV with me, but Eaddie didn’t join us, so we didn’t watch anything we had planned. Instead, the two of us watched Who Killed Santa? A Murderville Murder Mystery. When she left for bed, I watched Godzilla vs. Kong turned up to 11. Somehow, Eaddie fell asleep to that after saying she wanted to pull an all-nighter. I guess the best laid plans are paved with good intentions.

We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.

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O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

I couldn’t get my neck comfortable in bed last night, so I woke up with a headache. Summer went to work and Eaddie had a test in the morning, but came home afterward and took a shower. Summer wanted to do some shopping, so I cleaned up and then got her from the wash to go to Tractor Supply. She thought she’d be leaving work earlier and that we could go grocery shopping, but we had to postpone that. After she found a couple replacement wheels for work, I took her to Lowe’s to look at the other Christmas tree that I really liked. They had one left that was still brand new, but I thought I’d try and make a deal for the display model as well, just to lower my unit cost.

One of the managers was working nearby and quickly accepted my offer of $100 for both trees, so we carried it all to the front to check out, and then he helped us to the car. I took Summer back to work and then went to the old house to feed the fish and pick up a few things to take home. Dad wanted an old PC power supply to build a tiny space heater, so I grabbed a couple of those as well. When I got to his house, we tested the pinouts and they seemed to be working fine. I was pretty sure I had smoked both of them, but I decided to hold on to them just in case one would work on an old computer.

When I finally made it back home, Eaddie had left to hang out with friends, so I took the opportunity to set up the display model tree in the corner to the right of the TV. I spent quite a while fluffing the branches, and it looked really great. I had to move the other tree further away from the TV for symmetry, but having two trees actually looked really good. I have no idea what we’ll do with those spaces when it’s not Christmas, but it made Summer happy to have such nice trees when she got home.

I started to take the Onewheel to meet Summer at the Neighborhood Market, but decided it would be too crowded for my lack of confidence on the apparatus. It was just as well, because she still beat me there even when I drove. We got some food for the week, and then headed home for the evening. I cleaned up a little more, and we settled in to watch Leave the World Behind. I enjoyed the suspense, but Summer behaved expectedly tense.

Eaddie eventually made it home and really enjoyed the new tree, so we may take the other one and put it in her room. It may be excessive, but isn’t that the true meaning of the season anyway?

How blinky are thy LEDs!

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Wheelin’ and Dealin’

I slept in a little bit today after yesterday’s draining ride to Tulsa. I figured I’d try to catch the old work crew at Taco John’s for lunch, so I took a shower and headed over to sit with the maintenance crew while they ate. I forgot my phone, so I tried texting Zach from my watch when they didn’t show. He didn’t get back to me until much later to say that they hadn’t been very regular with Taco Tuesday lately. I ended up getting a few to-go, and took them to Summer at the wash. Then I headed back home to get my phone.

It was nice outside, so I decided to take the Onewheel out for a spin. I made it up the driveway and bailed, then took off down the road feeling pretty sketchy about it. I just couldn’t get my foot placement right, and having shoes on made me less tactile. I made it all the way to my parents’ house without biting the dust though, so I was fairly proud. Dad wasn’t home, so I turned around and headed back to the house and took the car to Rose Drug to pick up a prescription for Summer.

After I got the prescription, Dad was back home and I went over to try putting a little more air in the Onewheel to see if it helped some of my issues in the street. It doesn’t take much to really throw off the feel of the board, so I knocked it back down to just a pound or two above where it started. Then we went for a ride so Dad could try Full Self Driving. By the time we got back, it was about time for Eaddie to get home from school, so I headed to the house. She was only there for a little while though, since she had a short flute lesson.

When Eaddie got back, we went to La Huerta for dinner, and then I dragged her to Lowes to look at what Christmas trees they had left. They were all 75% off, and though I really liked one that only had different temperatures of white lights that twinkled nicely, I let her choose one with a much louder light pattern. We got it home and assembled, and then I spent the evening spreading all the tips while she got ready for bed. Summer got home from work late and kicked back on the couch to watch, and I watched a little YouTube before wrapping up for bed.

Like crumbs stuck to a piece of gum.

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The Coolest Fuckin’ Guy

I got around today and cleaned up a little bit while the girls were gone to work and school. I got screaming-mad at the dishwasher again, because Summer insists on partially loading it, and I basically have to unload everything once we have enough dishes, to rearrange them in the most compact way possible. She refuses to just leave it alone.

Afterward, I called to schedule a tow to the Tulsa Tesla Service Center, and then took a shower. At around 11, a guy named Moses come by from Diamond Ridge to check out the ceiling work we want done in the house, as well as the outhouse. He seemed to really recommend taking the existing ceiling down and hanging a new one, which made me a little nervous. I don’t really know where to start in the shed out back either, because we’re right in the middle of the expensive time of the year and it’s not like we’re just rolling in extra money.

There was a little bit of time to kill, but not too long before Doug from Storey Wrecker showed up. I drove my car onto the back of his truck, and then rode with him to Tulsa. I had asked the Tesla Roadside dispatcher if that would be alright, and I thought he had asked to confirm, but it sounded like it was a surprise to Doug. He didn’t seem to mind at all though, and spent the ENTIRE three hour drive telling me progressively less believable stories all about the cruise ships he had been on with the “Bruce Lee” silk dragon robe that his girlfriend bought him, how his son was a semi-professional wrestler and drill sergeant, and eventually some stories about sewing his wild oats and seeing Pink Floyd in Germany while he was in the military.

I would have liked to power through the trip, but he stopped once at the little oasis on the turnpike for a restroom break, and again just a few miles from our final destination to fill up with diesel. When we got to the service center, the actual service department was closed and for some reason I couldn’t get my car out of park. Being unable to drive it off of the truck, I ended up having to enable tow mode, which let it free-roll down and into a space.

Once I got inside, it seemed that the instructions for my loaner vehicle weren’t clear. It took the guy a little while, but eventually he set me up with a pretty new, white Model Y Performance with Full Self Driving. I started to drive away, but then stopped by the exit to adjust some settings, and the guy came out and caught me to get pictures of my license and insurance. It seemed like there should be a better process for that.

I wasn’t starving, but I wanted to eat before I left town, so I drove a couple miles away to a Cheddar’s and had some spinach dip and a chicken pot pie. I had forgotten that they seem to be famous for their honey butter croissants. All of the food was delicious.

From there, I headed on home in some relative cold. I had a little bit of range anxiety since I left the service center at 80%, but made it to Van Buren without any trouble. Full Self Driving was leagues better than my Enhanced Autopilot on the interstate. I think there were only like two incidents of something behaving a little goofy, and only one false lane change mistake. Mine changes lanes improperly all the time, and it’s infuriating that it’s not the same experience.

I got a large coffee to get me to my next stop in Ozark just to top off on Tesla’s dime. I picked up a sparkling water, and then powered on home as quickly as I could. I let FSD take me from the offramp all the way to the house, and it worked near-flawlessly. I didn’t take over driving at all, and it was great.

The girls were in bed, but awake for a little while. I laid with Summer for a bit before wrapping things up and going to sleep myself.

I’m not very patriotic, but after seeing it in the garage, I have to admit it would be kind of cool to complete the red, white, and blue set.

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I’m Yellin Timber

I woke up really early today after a long night, and didn’t really feel the need to go back to sleep. I made Summer a coffee when she got up, and she eventually pushed me to get cleaned up so we could go to the store. She wanted to make Chicken Florentine, which appears to be capitalized for some reason. She and Eaddie set up the Christmas tree while I was in the shower, and then Summer and I went to Walmart to shop around a bit.

I was pretty hungry, so the first thing we did was stop and try the new Krispy Krunch Chicken inside the Walmart. The chicken strips were awesome, but the jambalaya was pretty dry and lackluster. Once we finished there, we picked up some Dirty Santa gifts for her work parties, and then got stuff for food.

We stopped by the old house on the way home so I could feed the fish and grab a few glasses out of the cabinet. Then Eaddie started baking some pumpkin muffins when we got back. Summer cleaned up a bit around the house and then helped with the baking. It was a little late by the time they finished, and Summer had to sit down for a little while and wanted me to try and execute her dinner plans.

I wasn’t thrilled with that since I wasn’t really excited about the meal anyway. Then we realized she had forgotten to pick up sundried tomatoes. It hadn’t been a very good day, and this just made me crankier, so I decided I wasn’t cooking.

After a while, Summer got up to cook herself, so I prepared to go back out to the store. Just as I was getting dressed, I heard the loud crash of the Christmas tree falling behind the TV and smashing at least one ornament into shards all around the area and into the back of one of my subwoofers. I spent a while cleaning that up, and we eventually disassembled everything to throw the tree and its broken stand away.

Dinner was actually very good, though the amount of cream in the sauce nearly caused me trouble. Eaddie’s muffins turned out pretty sandy, but I think she was at least taking those to school so they shouldn’t sit around the house. The girls went to bed and I stayed up for some peace to myself before bed.

Talk to me, ooh-ooh, talk to me.

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Dear Eight-Pound, Six-Ounce, Newborn Infant Jesus

Sleeping was fairly uncomfortable with a weepy bit of road rash on the inside of my left ankle. I couldn’t believe the tire had gotten me as badly as it had, but I guess it just accelerated into me yesterday. I slept in pretty late, and got up to find Summer doing her nails. I spread some sauerkraut and mustard on a waffle and ate the last brat that was in the fridge. I thought the waffle might be a little more satisfying as bread, but it was pretty grainy.

I took a shower in the afternoon so we could go shopping, but Summer remembered that we were going to watch Christmas with The Chosen at UEC with Dad. Eaddie and I were hungry and she wanted cheese, so the three of us went to Cici’s for a late lunch before the movie.

We got to the theater just in time to find seats, and I was a little bit surprised at how empty the theater was. I guess all the church groups probably went to see it early. Some of the people sitting in front of us had snuck some really loud snack packaging into the theater, which struck me as a little ironic considering the forbidden nature of the act. The “movie” itself was about half music videos, with a few quick scenes of some dirty shepherds and a dirty messiah infant. I don’t know about Dad, but it wasn’t what any of the rest of us thought it would be.

After the movie, we headed home and Summer and I watched some TV. I started with a little YouTube, and then we ended up watching Rock-a-Doodle, which was shortish and relatively fun. Eaddie hid in her room all night, and I stayed up late configuring the old, original Pixel I bought for use as a photo backer-upper. Hopefully it plays nicely with the special photo and video editing features of my newer Pixel 8 Pro.

Don’t even know a word yet, but still omnipotent, with your golden diapers.

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Three Weeks

I stopped at Casey’s for a free slice of breakfast pizza on the way to work, and it was delicious. I hate how expensive extra toppings are, but I guess if they weren’t, I’d be ordering a whole pizza per week to take to work. It was the last day of school before break, and you could tell there weren’t as many kids there. Several were exempt from tests, and even more checked out in the middle of the day. Kim disappeared for a while in the afternoon, I guess to peruse other peoples’ potlucks. I stayed fairly busy trying to clean up old work orders.

After work, I stopped by Casey’s again for a free Snicker’s before going to the old house to feed the fish. Then I headed home and had just a little bit of time to get changed and earn some tire-rash on the Onewheel before Summer got home. She brought some thin chicken breasts and asparagus for dinner, and then wanted me to come up with dinner. I threw it all in a pan with a bunch of Italianesque seasonings, and it turned out pretty decent for a relatively unfussy meal.

Summer wanted to work on her nails and watch TV in the sunroom, but said the TV wouldn’t load Netflix. I opened up Vudu instead, and we ended up watching the last half of The Martian, followed by the old musical Camelot. I don’t recall ever watching it in its entirety, though I do remember having a VHS tape in my youth. We watched about a third of it before finishing the rest from bed. Then I wrapped up and it was off to sleep.

So we’re just gonna lie about how much we’re working? What could go wrong?!

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Out of Bits

Eaddie found a ride to school today so I didn’t have to drop her off. I got my free vitaminwater from Casey’s and made it to work in time for Kim to fuss about people already looking for me. The frustrating part about that was the fact that she very easily, especially after this many years, could have taken care of the issue. None of it was difficult, but it did require enough ambition to open an application and read a few words.

They had semester tests, so the big ask for the morning was to modify the bell schedule. They extended lunches, which meant I actually missed the boat and barely grabbed some pizza as they were putting everything away. Just as I was going back to my office to eat, Kenny yelled from across the cafeteria that the internet was down.

It wasn’t the internet. It was every single switch, and they were entirely inaccessible. I restarted the UNC service on the controller VM, and eventually walked to the core closet to cycle power on at least five different switches. It made no sense, and only served to frustrate me further.

After work, I fed the fish and brought a couple big speakers to the new house. While I was cleaning them up, I pushed one across the floor and scratched the tile a bit in front of the old refrigerator. Oh well. Summer was working late, and Eaddie was helping at the middle school concert, so I tried to make a dent in some leftovers from before Thanksgiving. Ridiculous.

I spent the rest of the night relaxing to some music and a light show in the living room, in an otherwise dark house until the girls got home.

Floaty