Chasing Lightning

It was a bit rainy on the way to work, but the drive wasn’t too bad. Lightning rippled through the clouds a few times, creating a fishing net of light cast across the sky. I arrived fairly early and Randy was already hard at work with the domain controllers. I mostly sat back so we didn’t have too many hands in the cookie jar, and instead fought an issue for our Cenergistic guy who couldn’t figure out how to remote into the system I set up for him. He eventually came by the office so I could take a look at his laptop, and it looked like he just couldn’t save the connection because of rotating credentials.

Randy and I met Jay, Charles, Kyle, and Hunter at Cotham’s for lunch, and I think my burger was even bigger than usual. It was great, and I tried to impart as much wisdom onto Jay as I could. I was feeling a little frisky, so I almost approached a girl for him, who he was eyeing, but I figured that would be best saved for another time.

Randy left for the day after dropping me off, and with Maggie out all day, things were quiet at the office. Time got away from me a bit, and then it was an aggravatingly slow drive home through traffic. The kids had just finished eating some leftovers when I got there, so I took Muad’Dib out for a run.

We went all the way out to Casey’s so I could redeem a free slush. We encountered an old lady walking a rather unruly dog, and she pointed at us saying it was bad because her dog didn’t like it. Muad’Dib stayed right by my side with hardly a look, and waited patiently outside while I got my slush. Tracy saw me walking out and said hello, and I thought the number of call center throwbacks has been wild this year. Muad’Dib and I rode down the sidewalk and crossed over without any trouble, and I decided to swing through the Ridgewood Brothers to see if anyone was home.

Failing there, we continued past Kroger, across town, through the basin for a dip, and down to see Dad for a while before we made it home. Seven and a half miles, and he loved every bit of it. The kids were gone, but Summer got home shortly after we did. She ate some leftovers, and then we wound down pretty quickly. Eaddie tried on her graduation gown when she got home, and it was off to bed before the Toad Suck race in the morning.

’cause the love that you lost wasn’t worth what it cost

Shame on Me

I managed to lock in this morning and had all screens going for maximum efficiency. Each answer led only to more questions, but that is often the case with so many hands in the cookie jar. I brought some leftover pizza and munched on that throughout the day, so I didn’t go to lunch. I just kept digging for our unknown domain controller, assuming that our problems were due to misconfigured DNS, and Kyle wasn’t able to articulate anything to help. I think I’m on top of something big, though.

The afternoon went by pretty slowly, but there were people through the office all day to keep things from getting too dull. Traffic home was horribly slow. Just after I got into town, a storm blew through and I could barely see ten feet ahead of me. Within my last mile I saw several large branches go down, and our driveway was flooding into the garage when I made it home. If I had realized how high the water was, I would have left the garage door closed and just run into the house by way of the equally flooded front walkway. At least the step up there would have been high enough to prevent water from coming into the house.

Summer was warming up leftover spaghetti while I ran around trying to direct the water from the driveway around the north side of the house. Eaddie and Eli tried to help just inside the door as I ran for things like the leaf blower, squeegee, and eventually a towel to keep from dripping all over the house. I don’t think there was any real water damage after that, and I got almost all of it out the door.

I ate with Summer while the kids studied in the living room, but she finished pretty quickly. As of last night we had plans to meet Shawna at Crystal Bridges on Sunday, but Summer said she backed out today because she has a new boyfriend with pictures to prove it. I wish that was more of a plot twist than any of us expected, but I just hope she finds what she needs.

Summer went for a bath while I spent some quiet time with Muad’Dib in the rain. I took care of some chores and then set up a new wireless microphone for Eaddie’s flute, which also involved testing out my old PA system. The kids played with that for a bit, then I cleaned up a bit in the kitchen before bed.

The sun doesn’t give light to the moon assuming the moon’s gonna owe it one.

PGA Tour

After the intensity yesterday, I knew I’d have to medicate today to keep the shakes down. I was early, so I just let the car do its thing to get me to the office, and from there I was actually pretty focused. I continued working in SCCM to fix some issues with Jim’s laptop deployment, but was still delayed by the network latency. At this point it would be much faster to just go to the high school and test my task sequences there.

I offered to take Maggie out to lunch for her birthday, but she said she had plans to meet a friend. She ended up disappearing for much of the day, so it was just the two old men and me, sipping my sweet tea all day. I didn’t eat my banana, and I wasn’t hungry for lunch, so I just plowed right through. I tried to stay hydrated, but somehow the lid to my cup popped off and I spilled 32 ounces of ice water all over the floor right outside our office. All I could do was shrug. I broke my cup and lid in the process, and to add insult to injury, they don’t seem to keep a mop in the closet with the other cleaning supplies. I had to use a rag to wipe it all up after wringing it out repeatedly.

The afternoon dragged by slowly, but quitting time eventually rolled around. I was exhausted and a bit dazed, but the car was a champ again. Eaddie called and wanted to know if we were going to go to Nebo with her, Eli, and my dad to take some more senior photos, so that was our new plan. I got home and tried to lay on the couch with Summer for a bit since she had gotten home fairly early. We started talking, and that continued off and on all night long.

The kids got there, followed by my dad, and we loaded Muad’Dib into the Pathfinder to drive up the mountain. Summer had to use the restroom, so we found the bathhouse first, then took some pictures at the overlook there. We still had quite a bit of daylight left, so we went around to the waterfall and took some pictures there. Our last stop was sunset point to get a few more shots as the sun set behind the clouds. I spotted a lone lady sitting on a rock staring into the distance, so I made a point to walk down by her with a smile and wish her well. I shared with her that I had spent many evenings there alone, and hoped that she was doing okay.

We stopped one last time at an overlook on the way down the mountain, and then headed home. My chat with Summer had kind of gone back and forth all day, but really took a defeating turn on the drive home. The way she digs into me and refuses any help unless somebody is forcing her makes me worry that I’m doing more harm than good just by being around at this point.

I didn’t find out until later, but Summer robbed my liquor cabinet on the way to take a bath. I warmed up some spaghetti for Eaddie and sat in the kitchen with her for another really great talk about how she basically wished we would split up. Coming from either of the other kids might have been an insult, but I knew what she meant. She just wants us both to be happy, and has a logical enough mindset that she sees a path forward for all of us. She recognized the decline of our relationship, especially after moving in together, and identified the core differences in our values and priorities. She especially didn’t want us sticking together on account of her, and hated that we’ve both been so unhappy in spite of how Summer says she feels. We discussed sitting down as a family to share our feelings, which is something I’ve struggled to get Summer to do even one-on-one, but Eaddie has proven time and time again that she has insight that both of us could use. She really is the daughter I always wanted.

I started to wind down, but heard Summer whimpering in the bedroom. By the time I got there, she was absolutely hammered and sobbing into her pillow from finishing my bottle of cocoa cayenne Bird Dog. In nearly eight years, I had never really seen her cry, and I’d definitely never seen her that drunk before. We “fought” for over two hours, mostly about me trying to get her to drink some water. I needed her to be able to open up emotionally, but in a more constructive way. We both called in to work, and I guess we’ll see if we can actually have an adult conversation tomorrow, but I’m betting on at least one hangover eating into that productivity. She is such an incredible woman, and we both learned and grew from one another a great deal in our time. I would still be broken in a big way without her. I never expected this to come to a head in this way. I’ve tried so hard, but I just don’t know if we can truly be good for one another in this kind of relationship.

Older than the ocean. Older than the night sky, I am.

Whiskey Business

I was absolutely riddled with anxiety all day long. MacLeod got me to work safely and I did my best to settle in. I’ve been really surprised at how quiet things have been, and I wondered when the techs actually got any work done since Jimmy and Gary have been spending nearly all day, every day at the office. I got into the script server to run a manual sync for a new sub, which prompted a call from Randy while he was out on bereavement. I had it handled, so all was well.

Time seemed completely irrelevant, and I continued to wring my hands and tap my feet because I think I knew what was coming. I skipped lunch and tried to focus on Mosyle until I had to stop and help Jim with an OS deployment on one of the new Acers he got for the high school.

The drive home was the worst, as tics slowly took over all motor control. Then, as if I had been building up to this moment all day long, Shawna texted and then called to set expectations. Selfishly involving her in our own troubles had caused more harm than the help I was meant to provide for her. It would have been different with any other person in the universe, but there was no way she had thought of me the way I had thought of her for all this time. I couldn’t help but to freefall.

By the time I got inside, I was shaking pretty violently. Summer was warming up leftover spaghetti for dinner, but found me shivering in the corner of the closet. I don’t know how long we talked from that point, but after an anxiety attack, I wasn’t in a position to interfere with anyone or anything else. I quickly found the Fireball to keep myself from making any surprise trips out of town, and sat down to eat with Summer.

After our expectedly awkward dinner, I took Muad’Dib out for a run. He was amazing even when we encountered other dogs, including a loose poodle around the basin. He took a quick dip in the creek, and then we went back up and through the roundabout before making our way to my parents’ house. Dad came out with some leftover pork loin for him, and then we made it home where Summer and I sat out on the porch together for a bit.

The evening wound down pretty quickly after that since I wasn’t fit to put much brain power into anything else. Eaddie got home late and came to visit me briefly, and I eventually found my way to bed.

But what if it had actually worked???

Swing, Swing, Swing

I went to bed super late and woke up when Summer made her coffee so I wouldn’t waste the day. We spent some time with the dog, and then she went to the gym while I tried to clean things up a bit. Suzanne and her godmother came over to return the old turtle tank I gave her, but I ended up telling her to just sell it and keep the money rather than let me put it into storage since I still have two large tanks that are unused.

Eaddie went out with Eli for an Easter service, and Summer and I eventually made it to the Neighborhood Market to get stuff to make salads and spaghetti for dinner. When we got home, I continued cleaning while she cooked. Then I took Muad’Dib out for a good run and returned Dad’s sledgehammer. I felt like that extra weight made my feet hurt on the Onewheel even more than usual.

The kids got home and we all sat down to eat a really great spaghetti dinner, and everything turned out really great. Summer cleaned up afterward, as I dealt with some minor aggravations. Later on, Eaddie went to chat with Summer in bed for a while, then came to talk to me as well. We ended up going to sit in the living room and had a great talk for a couple of hours until I started trying to fall asleep.

I should have known from the start.

Draining Circles

I was pretty hungry as I got into North Little Rock this morning, so I decided to stop by the donut shop for an assortment. Randy was out all morning and there wasn’t really anything else going on, so I did a bit more research on my taxes, and then spent most of the day pumping out Vine reviews to get my percentage back up. I’ve been seriously slacking, so I’ve got a lot of ground to cover to keep this thing going.

The morning went by super fast, and I took a late lunch to grab a Minecraft Big Mac meal from McDonald’s. Then the afternoon was more of the same quiet until quitting time. Julie called to chat for a while on the drive home, and then Summer was hungry when I finally got back into town, so the two of us went to La Huerta to share some nachos and then sat at home and talked for quite a while.

I took Muad’Dib out for a run just before it got dark, and I think he may have reached a high speed the way he was tearing through the yards on our downhill run. My parents got tickets ahead to see The Chosen, so we continued on through our route to get home. It was a quick evening to get everyone settled down, and then I spent the remainder of the night finalizing my taxes. I’ll review the actual forms tomorrow to check for errors, but I think they’re probably done well enough. I guess there’s always the chance that Ol’ Donnie will axe the IRS, so it may not matter anyway.

Remove yourself.

Tempestas Fugit

I got up this morning and considered taking Muad’Dib out for a bath, but as soon as I started petting him, even more hair came right out of his coat. He’ll need to get further along in his shedding before we bring him in for any length of time. I had plans to be pretty productive for the day, but it just didn’t happen. Summer was up and we were able to have what I thought was a long, meaningful chat. Eaddie had to prepare for prom when she got up, so all I really did after that was eat some tacos and then wait around for her.

Eli’s mom came over in the afternoon to do Eaddie’s hair and makeup. As they finished up, we got some pictures and then went outside to wait for his dad and sister to come and take pictures outside. I took Muad’Dib up the street for a quick jaunt just to burn some energy, and he jumped into Eli’s opened driver-side door when we got back. He knows cars are for adventures now, and he’s not afraid to go for it. The kids did great, and even Muad’Dib sat still long enough for some photos before they left.

Summer and I chatted some more in the evening, and I eventually got outside to grill a couple of burgers for dinner. It was dark by then, so I took Muad’Dib out for a run and tried to catch up with Shawna for a bit. We stopped to see my parents and their new kitchen countertop, and then it was a fairly quick night to bed. The kids came home to change before going to the after-prom party, but neither of us could stay up as late as they would be.

So taxing.

Beef Stroganov

Neither Summer nor I slept very well last night, but for all of the up and down, I actually didn’t have any trouble getting moving. I actually got out of the house a little bit early and beat everyone to work except for Gary. The middle school was still down, and there was some finger-pointing about whether it was a problem on our side or on Windstream’s side.

I tinkered a little bit, but again didn’t have much direction today. I was actually alone for much of the morning since Randy had his executive team meeting and Maggie had some kind of training. Lunch time came around pretty quickly and I ended up going to Popeye’s for a couple chicken sandwiches. The chick that was working the drive-through wasn’t in the mood for whatever her customer kept saying, because I could hear her sassing him over the speaker as I walked in, then got to witness her exaggerated eye rolling once I made it inside.

The sandwiches were good, but I didn’t quite “get” the pickle seasoning version. The pickle slices were huge on both sandwiches though. After that, I tinkered in Mosyle for a bit to try and deploy the Adobe suite on a “donated” MacBook. The afternoon went by more slowly until the last hour, which sped by.

Traffic home was incredibly slow for no discernible reason. I got home and took Muad’Dib out for a good run while Summer was at the gym. When we got back, we ate the slow cooker noodles and meatballs that she made to resemble a beef stroganoff. It was actually pretty good, and it kept growing on me the more I ate. The green beans she made were good, but undercooked for me. Overall it was a good, easy dinner.

She was still nervous about her second mammogram, but kept busy doing some work from home while I put together an Adirondack chair. I wasn’t quite confident enough to sit in it myself, but I think Summer liked it alright. Eaddie was out late having Eli’s mom do her hair as practice for prom. We settle down fairly quickly, then it was off to bed.

Turns out all of my highs are making love to my lows

Best Doggy Life

Muad’Dib did great in our room last night, and Summer took him out for a potty break in the morning while I tried to sleep in a little bit. We eventually got cleaned up and she walked him, then I rode the Onewheel around the parking lot with him after we got everything out of the hotel and into the car. That was when I ran into Ashante, Julie’s old friend from school. She wanted to meet Muad’Dib, and I told her the story of how I found him. I mentioned that he made the trip from Russellville, and that got the wheels turning on how we knew each other. She remembered going to a pool party and me running around with a “Chucky” doll.

After all of that, we wanted to get lunch before Dad’s matinĂ©e show, so I found a dog-friendly restaurant called Red’s Pizzeria just a short walk from the trolly station with EV charging. Summer and I took Muad’Dib over to start charging and waited for my parents to show up. The restaurant was super cute, with basically a counter to place your order, and then a multi-level outdoor patio to sit and eat. Muad’Dib laid down by my side and was super chill the entire time, and the pizza was pretty good.

Back at the convention, the show was good. Dad’s Miser’s Dream went well, and Muad’Dib was much less nervous than the first night when we walked in and sat down right in the middle of a packed house. After the show, we tried to go back to the strip to walk around, but both chargers were occupied and I didn’t feel comfortable going to pay for parking in another place that was a tighter fit. We ended up going back to the chargers and just waiting for one of those two people to come back for their car. Fortunately it didn’t take too long, and it was a nice rest on a bench in the shade with the dog.

By then it was time to get dinner, so we made our way down to Local Flavor Cafe, who also had a porch for dogs. I rode the Onewheel down the hill in case I needed to go park for my parents and act as a faster valet service. They ended up just parking in the bank lane since they were closed, and we had a nice dinner. Our server even brought out a fresh bowl of water for Muad’Dib, who spent most of the time under my chair and got plenty of scraps.

The evening show was really good, but the three of us were exhausted from running around so much. Muad’Dib had the best doggie vacation he’d ever had, and behaved so wonderfully. He rode home perfectly with a quick stop in Ozark, and then he was super excited to see Eaddie when we got home. I let him sleep in Eaddie’s room, and Summer went straight to bed. I was up unexpectedly late, and I just know I’ll pay for it later.

I skipped a roll.

A Dog and a Magic Show

Summer’s phone started ringing pretty early this morning, so we didn’t sleep in very late. My legs felt swollen all night even after I woke up and put a pillow under them to lift them up slightly. It was a really slow start to the day, but we eventually got ready and everything packed to go to Eureka Springs. Eli came over because Eaddie was staying behind for their anniversary. I had to run to my parents’ house for a shirt that Dad forgot, and the dog food he still had since we were out of the good stuff that Muad’Dib liked.

I liked the back seat protector I got for my car, so we set it up and loaded Muad’Dib up, and we headed up to Arby’s for some lunch before we left. We tied him to a light post outside where we could see him, then made the trip to Ozark to charge and get snacks, and give him another break.

That stop went well, and he handled the ride perfectly up to that point, but we were about to hit the curves and I was a little bit nervous after he threw up in Eaddie’s car the other day. He took it like a champ though, and calmed down enough to play with his little stuffed raccoon that we brought for him. We stopped just before we got to Eureka for another quick potty break, and he jumped right back into the car without any trouble.

My parents were getting a group together for dinner, so we arrived at La Familia Tex-Mex just before everyone started ordering. I tied Muad’Dib up on the deck outside and gave him a little bowl of food so he wouldn’t look so abandoned. I checked on him a couple times, and then Summer and Dad went out after they ate. She ended up spending more time with him while I finished up, and then we finally made it to the hotel.

We got checked in, and then I took Muad’Dib around the parking lot for a run to burn off some of that pent-up energy he had from the drive. He did pretty well, but was expectedly excited to be in a new place. I did learn that he really needs a rigid leash instead of an elastic one, because he responds perfectly to the feedback I can give him on a rigid line. The elastic completely ruins that feedback loop for us, but makes it more awkward than just going outright off-leash. We eventually made it down to the convention center for the evening magic show, and it took him a while to calm down, but he did eventually lay down in the floor at my feet.

The show was really good, and I was surprised at the amount of people in the crowd. When we got back to our building, I ran him around the covered walkway since it had rained slightly while we were at the show. He still had a bunch of energy and pounced on Summer in the bed for a while, but eventually laid down in the floor by me while I worked on my computer. I was up a lot later than I intended, but there’s nothing new about that. We’re only here for one day, so we’ll have to figure out charging tomorrow sometime, while also having somebody that isn’t allowed everywhere we might want to go. He’s still been great, but that’s why I chose this familiar trip to learn how to travel with a dog.

No accidents yet!