Tag: anxiety

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Call Me Ishmael

Today was a lonely day at work. Kyle showed up and sat at his desk for a few minutes like he sometimes does, but otherwise I was in the corner by myself all day. Randy was somewhere else, but messaged me to get a server going for Go Phish, as well as FortiAuthenticator. Go Phish was deceptively easy to set up, because it also requires another domain from which to launch phishing campaigns. It seems less effective to only have one consistent domain from which to phish your own team.

Summer came to get me for lunch and we went to Red Lobster. The food tasted good, but she had a rough time afterward. I didn’t feel great, but I think it was just too greasy. I’ve been craving some clean food lately, and that wasn’t it.

The afternoon was quiet, and the old men continued wasting their time, which only frustrated me further. I had a dozy ride home with a touch of anxiety that had been around all day, and eventually went to my parents’ house with Muad’Dib for bún bò Huế. After we ate, I took him on the rest of his shortened, hot walk. I let him play in the creek and then had to give him a proper bath when we got back home.

Dad wanted to open the pool, so I had the kids meet me over there. They were supposed to go to a movie, but they said Autumn stood them up again. That was frustrating for multiple reasons, including the fact that she never replied to me when I initially asked them for help. They did end up helping uncover the pool though, and then I headed back home to crash.

From hell’s heart I stab at thee!

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Imagin’ That

Muad’Dib spent much of the night on the floor for some reason. I don’t know if he got too hot between us, or maybe he just felt bothered. He was still quiet through the night though. I got out pretty early, and it was a quiet morning until Randy messaged me at the last minute and had me sit in on a call with Bitdefender. That call was more interactive than I would have liked, but it went fine aside from the moment they asked me to interpret the law for them.

I met Randy, Jim, and Kyle at Jacob’s Wings where I tried their “King Potato.” It didn’t have enough of my choice lamb meat on it, and the potato itself tasted pretty microwaved. I ended up stopping at the Wendy’s on the way back and picked up a small chili to make up for it.

The afternoon was even more quiet as I imaged a fourth laptop that was brought to me. Then I made it home through a recurrence of some anxiety. I had an attack once I got home, but that was over quickly. The kids were playing Clone Hero on Eli’s laptop, so I hooked up the speakers for them in time to play one last song before putting it away.

My parents were going to have bún bò Huế, but Dad texted that he forgot to get the beef started, and they had spaghetti instead. Once Summer got home from work, we headed straight over to eat. Then we made it home so I could take Muad’Dib out for a run just before it got dark. We took an alternate, shorter route because he’s been slower and more tired in the heat, and I also wanted to avoid any water features so he could make it home relatively clean.

It was super quick to wrap up once we got home. Summer was in bed and Brody called to ask about Johnny, so we talked for a bit. Then I vacuumed Muad’Dib’s fur out and headed to bed.

We went through all that just to be strangers again.

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Barrels of Fun

We planned to clean up the shop at work today, so after a brief period of getting everyone together, we all went outside to rearrange and put things on shelves. Some of the shelves were moved more than what any of us thought was necessary, but as Randy put it, I won’t actually be spending any time out there, so it doesn’t matter to me.

Time seemed to pass super slowly, so it was quite a while until lunch. Kyle, Randy, Jay, and I went to BJ’s for catfish, and then we quietly wrapped up the afternoon. I had an anxiety attack at some point, so it seems like the Lexapro isn’t doing much for me.

When I eventually got home, the north fence line was completely down and the kids had Muad’Dib inside. I wound down a bit before taking him for a run, and we went to Casey’s for a free slush. I predicted that it would be “out of order” again, and sure enough it was. We turned right back around and headed to the basin, to my parents’ house, and then home.

The kids were gone by then, but Summer was in the bath. I gave Muad’Dib a bath so he could stay inside, and then it was a quick night to bed before Summer’s run on Mt. Magazine.

Delicious.

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M-m-m-my Vilonia

I took it a little slower this morning and met Randy at Bob’s Grill in downtown Conway for breakfast. We had chorizo breakfast burritos that were pretty good, but also pretty small for the price, along with a pretty presumptuous 23% minimum suggested tip. Then we both ended up driving to the Vilonia school district to meet up with Billy, their network admin. They were in a little portable building way out on the edge of the campus, and we sat in the back room where Billy showed us their Intune and Entra environment.

I was wholly unimpressed. I tried to go in with an open mind, but the more I saw, and the more workarounds he showed us, it seemed like they would have been better off to just stick with the legacy SCCM until they axe it for good. It was a long, slow morning until lunch.

The three of us went to Simple Simon’s for the local pizza buffet, and the food was pretty good. They did a great job of keeping their tiny bar stocked. We visited for a while before heading back to finish up the afternoon. I started to feel a bit of churn late in the afternoon, so I couldn’t get out of there quickly enough. I made it home, but had a pretty rough night after that.

Summer got home a little later and made shrimp Alfredo for the kids while I laid on the couch for a bit. Then I got up to take Muad’Dib out for a run. He was pretty slow, and kept wanting to wander away, so I had to baby him a bit more than usual. I wasn’t thrilled.

We ended up cutting off the last block to get home, and we wrapped up the evening fairly quickly. I still didn’t feel great, and Summer had some nerve issues with her legs as well. The kids stayed up watching TV, but I made it to bed a little bit early.

It’s so dramatic how you run from better days.

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Put the Past Away

DNS didn’t actually scavenge anything because it only triggered the aging, so we won’t know for a couple weeks if it actually worked. I guess that’s fine, since graduation was tonight and we won’t have people on site for it to matter. I got back into SCCM to try and clean up the stuck update, and found the right combination and order of commands to fix it, so I was able to re-run the newest update.

Summer was in Little Rock for her own meeting, so we met at Red Lobster for unlimited soup and salad. Just as I parked, I got a call from Bitec to schedule a Teams interview. We ate, and then she came back to the office with me to do some work until her surgery consultation. I guess Randy was in a bad mood, because he kind of flipped out at me when I said I invited her in, but he mellowed out pretty quickly.

Just before the appointment, Summer headed out to find her appointment, but she didn’t actually know where she was going. She got to the address she had in the calendar entry and discovered for the first time that it was just a residential home, and called me crying that she didn’t know where to go. I had already left too, but pulled over at Franklin’s to talk to her. I just told her to call the doctor and see if she could find who they referred her to, since she didn’t even have the business name.

After some Googling and a bit of guesswork, she ended up getting a call from the CARTI Cancer Center, asking if she was going to make her appointment. They guided her in and I met her there after I went to the Baptist Health Breast Center by mistake. We went in for the consult and scheduled an appointment to remove the atypical cellular mass, so that was pretty good news. It didn’t feel like either of us were hugely relieved, but that was probably due to the continued confusion and frustration over the process up to this point.

We finally headed to Conway to Supercharge, and went in to Five Guys to share some fries. She wasn’t hungry, but I decided to try a hot dog that was pretty okay. I still think they’re hugely overpriced, but the location was right. Then we headed home.

As I got to the Pottsville offramp, there was an overturned semi blocking the entire right lane from the westbound onramp. The car in front of me made a full stop before finally pulling over, and it looked to have just happened because someone else had pulled over and was running up to the windshield to check on the driver. There were enough people pulled over that I knew I couldn’t provide any additional help, so I got out of the way.

When I got home, the kids were assembling the headboard I got for Eaddie. I took Muad’Dib out for his first run in a few days, which he enjoyed. We visited Dad, and then I left him outside when we got home, since he took a bath in the creek. I took care of a few Vine things, had an anxiety attack, and then laid down with Summer for a bit before I had to get up and complete my tasks before bed.

You don’t have to say it again. I heard it the first time.

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Slippery When Whet

I was up several times last night, either on my own, or with Muad’Dib. He did pretty well to sleep with us all night, and I felt better confining him to the bedroom. I wish Eaddie had left her room open so he could go in there with her, because otherwise I could remove the baby gate and just keep him in our bedroom alone.

We got up late and Summer made some breakfast for us while Eaddie left for church. We had a pretty quiet morning until she got back, and then Summer left for the gym. It eventually started raining and did that for most of the afternoon, but I got some laundry done and then we took a trip out in it to get some groceries for dinner.

Eaddie brought Eli and Cecilia over for dinner, and I grilled some pork steaks and burgers while Summer made rice, sweet potato, and a cake that didn’t quite get finished before the end of the night.

Smooth

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Runny Eggs and Fuzzy Pizza

I got up early so I could go to the run with Summer and Eaddie, but it was a bit stormy with some rain, so I let them go by themselves and just stayed home instead. When they got back with Eli, we all went to Stoby’s for breakfast. They were packed in spite of the rain, so we had to wait a bit, and then also had to wait a while for our food once we had ordered. The service was fine, but the kitchen was so slow that she actually had one of our meals refunded without us saying anything.

After breakfast, we headed back home while Summer went to work for a bit. Eaddie asked if they could give Muad’Dib a bath, and that turned into me giving Muad’Dib a bath. He did fairly well, though they did miss their biggest opportunity to throw a towel on him before he shook water all over her bathroom. I brushed him out, then used the blow dryer brush on him, which he didn’t love. The kids ended up leaving, and then I got out the vacuum attached fur brush, and he surprisingly didn’t mind that at all. I pulled two canisters of hair off of him and then put up a baby gate in the hallway in case he stayed in overnight.

I ended up putting on some music and taking a bath after that, until Summer got home from work. We had a moment to talk and tried to work through some things before the kids made it back along with Cecilia. They wanted to have a game night, so we played some Uno for a bit. Summer ordered some Domino’s which Neal delivered. Then the kids watched TV while Summer and I started wrapping up our evening.

No surprises.

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Double Dog Dare

Summer texted when I got to work that Muad’Dib walked over the fallen fence to play with Nova nextdoor. The neighbor called someone to come quote a repair, but he was cool with the dogs playing together, and Summer said they were having a great time, so I didn’t sweat it. Then Johnny called and said Bitec had an “urgent” listing for the job I had previously interviewed for, so I replied back to an old email and then did a quick refresh on my résumé before applying through Indeed.

The rest of the morning was spent going through DNS again in preparation for turning on scavenging in the afternoon. Otherwise it was pretty quiet. Howard bought us pizza for a vendor call, and we sat through a presentation by Decept10 before the U.S. Pizza Co. arrived. I had another anxiety attack at some point, and then the rest of the afternoon was relatively lazy and short.

Randy said we could leave just a hair early for our three-day weekend, so I headed out and grabbed a bottle of rum in Morrilton. I opened a bunch of packages from Vine when I got home before Summer. She didn’t feel well when she got there, so she took a bath while I ran Muad’Dib. We took an extended run to Ridgewood where we met a new girl named Cindy who talked to me for a bit about riding her Onewheel on trails. Then we continued to Casey’s to try for a slush, but the machine was out. On the way out, a kid that had asked to pet Muad’Dib asked if he could try the board, so I helped him out. Then we rode back across town.

Dad met us in the road, and then I went in to eat some roast beef while he played with Muad’Dib. Then we got home just after dark. The kids had left for something, and Summer was laying on the couch half dead. I put her to bed, and quickly wound down.

I hate this so much.

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Nothing’s Permanent

I had a pretty lucid morning. I dug into DNS records and made note of anything that looked important that wasn’t set statically. It sounded like some of the others were helping Jim at the high school, but nobody said anything to me about it, so I just sat in the office with Jimmy all day, except for a trip to Taco Bell for a quick and cheap lunch.

The afternoon twitches showed up right on time, I had an anxiety attack, and I just got more and more tense as I made it home through slow traffic. I felt like every muscle in my body was just slowly bound.

Noah and Eli were over and Summer was making dinner. Chicken bits pan fried in some random bottle of sauce she bought, Brussels sprouts that were overspiced enough that Eli nearly choked out, and mashed sweet potato. Exactly what I envisioned.

After dinner, I took Muad’Dib out for a run and we did our best to dodge other dog walkers. The couple of dogs we couldn’t avoid weren’t too much trouble, so it was a good run. We visited Dad for some brushing, then got home and wound down.

That goes doubly for DNS records.

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No, I Know

Today was another day mostly on my own. I ended up going to Chipotle to pick up a burrito for lunch.

I got stuck in traffic on the way home because they had one lane closed around Menifee.

Dad took Muad’Dib out for a walk during the day, so I waited until the sun went down to take him for our run. I put together a laundry cart I got from Vine so I could give a larger one to Eaddie since she’s had trouble with hers spilling out all over the floor.

Eaddie had Maristella over later in the evening, so Summer was in bed by the time we got home. I wrapped up and went to sleep.

Ooh, bеt you’re thinking, “She’s so cool”