Tag: anxiety

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Game Daze

I had an anxiety attack in the middle of the night, which was the first one I’ve been aware of in a couple weeks. I went back to sleep until it was time to get up, and had a fair start after that. We actually got to work a hair early, but then chatted with Teisha until people came in. I stayed fairly focused on my tablet project, and eventually found by complete chance that it was failing because it wanted a GUID instead of a tenant name. It all just feels terribly documented.

We took a late lunch to grab some quick Taco Bell, and then I think the salt made me dizzy immediately afterward. Evidently two burritos are more than your daily suggested intake, and I drowned them in fire sauce to boot. That feels like it shouldn’t be legal.

The afternoon went by fairly quickly and without much success after that. We left pretty close to quitting time since we had to get home for Eaddie’s first game. Summer was already home and ready to go, and left early to find herself a spot. She planned to stay through halftime, and I didn’t want to pay for a ticket, so Muad’Dib and I drove later.

We ended up getting stuck by a fire truck, and then a train, so we didn’t get there until most of the way through the pregame performance on the lawn. We didn’t even catch up with Summer, because she didn’t see my text and just went on in. Instead, we headed back home and I took Muad’Dib for an early run to my parents’ house to find some dinner.

My parents were outside watering plants, so I warmed up the curry and eventually had a bowl by myself. It was dark by the time I finished, and that was all before they finished, so I left just as they came inside. Summer stayed a bit later than either of us expected, but eventually made it home and straight to bed. I wasn’t long behind.

Buddahcup!

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HAHANO

We got to work today, hoping to leave early to pick up my car. I was fairly busy all morning trying to catch up, but I skipped lunch and got permission to leave at three. Summer picked up the Buick from my parents’ house and I met her at the wash in Maumelle so they could do an outside wash and quick detail for us. Then we continued to Sam’s Club where we left Muad’Dib in the Model 3 loaner until we could return the Buick and finish up with my car.

It was spotty and dirty from sitting outside all week, but the concern spots from before looked to be resolved. We definitely just accepted it as-is out of exhaustion over the situation, though. While we were checking it out, Summer noticed my front wheels were showing cord on the inside, which was likely caused by the bumpiness I had been experiencing. We settled up, then went back to move Muad’Dib over to my car. I had an anxiety attack in the middle of that, which made my fourth in four days. Summer called Discount Tire to try and find replacements, but the computers were down in Russellville after the quick and powerful storm that blew through earlier, and they couldn’t see whether they had any.

When we got to Tesla, I asked them about squeezing me in. They had the tires, but not the manpower, and couldn’t do anything for me. We decided to continue home carefully, and I’d just have to get tires and an alignment back home. We continued on to KPOT at Summer’s request and had hot soup for dinner. I was sweating profusely, and probably didn’t enjoy the food as much as I could have, but it was still good.

Anneka at Gwatney forgot to charge me up some more, but we managed to make it to Conway for a Supercharge. Then I took it easy all the way home. Summer left her car at my parents’ house, so Muad’Dib and I ran over there on the Onewheel to get it. Then it was a quick cleanup to get to bed on time. Eaddie came by and ran through the house, but was hardly here for more than a minute.

I’m two tired for this.

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Wackadoodle

I woke up fairly early today and waited for Summer to get around. She slept quite a while longer, but didn’t get around to doing a whole lot aside from going to the gym. I spent all day milling back and forth cleaning up a bit, mostly in the kitchen. I cleaned up a whole bunch of leftovers, but we’ve still got more to go. It just doesn’t seem to go very fast. Eaddie came home briefly and then left. Otherwise, Summer and I were just at the house all day long.

When dinner time came around, I grilled the brats we bought last weekend. We ate, and then somewhere along the way I had a pretty bad anxiety attack just walking down the hallway. After a little while, we settled down to watch Arthur the King, which I thought was pretty good. Summer couldn’t handle the suspense, but I think she liked it. It was nearly dark when we finished, but Muad’Dib told me he really needed a run, so I took him out for a really good, short one in the dark. Then it was pretty much straight to bed after that.

No one else is gonna do it for you.

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A Lot for a Little Run

I got up early so I could go to Fort Smith with Summer for her run this morning. I had an anxiety attack as I was getting ready, but it didn’t seem to affect me long. I was still pretty exhausted as we left, but it was a smooth ride. We made it to Ben Geren park only to discover a disappointing number of runners, running anything from a 5k to a marathon, depending on how many times they looped back around the track. It didn’t really seem like many people knew each other, but it was a seriously tiny group of maybe 20 people. One of them was Hot Springs native, multi-title world champion, professional arm wrestler, “Monster” Michael Todd, who arrived in a giant motorhome wrapped with giant pictures of his face. There appeared to be no fanfare. We arrived early, because Summer anticipated it would take her some time to get her packet, but we spent all that extra time wandering around in the hot sun.

I had forgotten to load my Onewheel, so when the race finally started, Muad’Dib and I walked over to a pavilion with some picnic tables and sat in the shade. We had a surprisingly strong breeze over there, which I hadn’t felt at all when we were walking around. It felt really great over there as we waited, expecting to see Summer come around the bend. I took a picture of a couple cheering on their son, then shared it with them. Summer never showed up though. Evidently her run took her on another path, and we found her back at the finish after less than half the time it took us to drive to the race in the first place.

We didn’t stick around, and instead drove to a place called Digs in The Bakery District. I guess it was a little grouping of places in one spot. We found parking across the street and walked up to the patio where they were doing yoga. A server greeted us, had us pick a seat, and then the food service was quite quick. Muad’Dib did well with some passers-by, and we had a really tasty, elevated, expensive brunch. We had a couple cocktails and shared a bagel board with a couple fancy cream cheeses and peanut butter. Then Summer had a sandwich, and I had a burrito. Everything was really tasty, but definitely priced as an upscale establishment in a rich part of town.

Lastly, we swung by Truong Son on the way home to browse for some Asian foods. We didn’t get much, but I picked up a smallish can of Café du Monde coffee and chicory blend to add to my collection. I made a cup when we finally made it home, but found it mostly bitter. Summer and I lounged around the house the rest of the day, both exhausted from the morning adventure. I eventually had some leftover chicken salad for an early dinner, and cleaned a bunch of moth-filled boxes of cereal out of the pantry. We played a Netflix miniature golf game on the TV, and then Summer watched the worst of the Ghostbusters movies.

I did a bit of cleaning, but it was overall a very quiet evening until bed.

It’s a vibe.

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ANOTHER ONE

I had an anxiety attack in bed just after midnight when I got up to go to the restroom, but went right back to sleep. I got to sleep in a very little bit since we were headed to Little Rock for my car. She went to her bank to get some money for me, and I went to Arvest to close my account, since they wanted to start charging for basic checking accounts. I took Muad’Dib in and we saw Aaron first. Then I was maybe a little too surprised that there was zero effort to try and talk me into some other kind of bank account, or keep me as a customer. I told the young teller that I wanted to close my account, she took my ID, and then handed me a cashier’s check for my balance after just a few seconds. She then had to cash that for me, which felt silly, but then it was done. My first bank account, which I’d had since childhood, and which only held birthday money for years before my first job, was closed.

We hit the road after that. Summer had to get back to work, so we dropped her car off at the Love’s in Morrilton, then continued to Gwatney in the loaner to get my car. I also queued up Randy and Ben for lunch before we headed home. My car was right out front, and I guess I should have looked it over first. They didn’t really even walk me around it. I just took a moment while Anneka was gathering paperwork, and walked around it quickly. I immediately spotted a blemish just under the left taillight. Then Summer looked closer and found flaws on the edge of the hood. Anneka took it back to see if they could buff any of it out, but then came back and said we would have to schedule another visit.

They had a Buick Envista that they had just gotten in for a loaner, so rather than come back next week, we took the loaner and also kept the loaner Model 3 from Tesla. That created a predicament later. We left there and dropped the Buick off at the high school before meeting Randy, Jim, Jae, and Ben at Cotham’s. I sent Summer in to find a table, and luckily Ben was already there. I waited outside with Muad’Dib until everyone else got there, and then we had lunch. I wasn’t impressed with any of the food this time, which was rare. The hubcap burgers have always been excellent. We had a good time visiting, but Summer needed to be back at work in a hurry, so we left.

I dropped Summer off at her loaner, then went to Conway to Supercharge in order to make it home. It wouldn’t have been a problem, except I didn’t expect to have to drive it back home. She went straight to work, so I ended up going to Love’s to swap out her car just to get it out of the public parking lot. I went to work for a couple hours, and then Teisha gave me a ride to Love’s so I could leave Summer’s car at work overnight inside the gate.

I got home and had a ton of stuff from Vine, but it all processed super quickly. It was actually mostly clothes for the girls, but I did get a bike service stand that needed some assembly. Eaddie and Eli chatted in the kitchen over some food he brought while I assembled it, and then they both left. She went to spend the night with Autumn because she had created some new health drama and needed to draw more attention to herself.

Summer eventually made it home from her work meeting, and we went to swim at my parents’ house. I thought they’d check out the Buick, but they were busy watering plants. Muad’Dib ran both ways, but had to stop and poop on the way back. It looked like it was all loose, so something he ate didn’t sit well with him. I ended up walking about a third of the way back home with him while Summer drove home.

They went to bed and I prepared for work, but it was a pretty quick night to bed.

You didn’t have anyone quality check it???

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Hound Town

I had a little bit of a rough start this morning, but we squeezed into work for a quiet day. Teisha had Janice’s two little dogs closed up in her office, so we just headed straight upstairs. Scott hit me up immediately with a dead laptop, but he just had something stuck in his charge port. Then Heaven had an issue with Rhonda’s computer monitor, but I just had to unplug it for a moment. After that, I was left to my own devices.

I had an anxiety attack pretty early in the morning that left me feeling super exhausted for a while. Otherwise I didn’t really start the day with a goal, but I got into my Netbox documentation again briefly, and did some more “practice” networking. I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but I think all this fighting security devices has made me more comfortable with practical networking and subnetting. Next is to get into some routing and firewall configuration, but I keep wanting to just rebuild the entire network. I need to give myself some more time to “accidentally discover” more physical stuff in our environment.

We took a late lunch and went to Taco Bell. It was hot, but we had shade and a small breeze, so it felt okay out. Summer was upset that she had to work in the heat all day, but still hadn’t made any real moves to change her situation. She got home shortly after we did, and was pretty immediately just miserable to be around. She was hungry, but didn’t want to do anything about it. I eventually just stepped away until she came to find me, and I pointed her at her leftover pasta she made a week ago. I eventually came out to have some too.

I found the new Masters of the Universe on Prime Video, so I put that on for her and then took Muad’Dib out for a run. We visited my parents, and then I let him guide us back home, skipping all of the zigs and zags. Summer was finishing up her movie and went to bed. I got things ready for work, and then made it to bed early myself.

You’re on your own!

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Back Doorman

Internet at home was still out until late in the morning, without much news from TCW. I was excited to get to experiment with some scheduling instead of just beating my head against the wall over intercom programming today. Nobody else seemed to show any feelings about it, but I assumed they were just glad I finally fixed something. Of course now I also have a backup, and can replicate my success in a few minutes rather than weeks. Programming was relatively straightforward, but the holiday scheduling had me stumped for a while. The guides I found all had them added to schedules, but that wasn’t the case. Just adding the holiday dates defaulted the lock schedules to a locked state.

We took a really late lunch and picked up some free McNuggets, then had chili cheese fries and onion rings at Sonic. It was cheap and light, and the weather was great for it. When we got back, I stopped by the back gate to test the closing, and it worked perfectly. I had its schedule fixed, but now that the plant is running around the clock, the gate isn’t really even necessary.

The last piece of the puzzle for now was to get cameras integrated with the security system, but everything I tried seemed incompatible between systems. I had an anxiety attack late in the afternoon, but it cleared up well. We left a little late after verifying the gate shut properly. Then we made it home to find Eaddie back from her band conference, and Summer in the bath.

Once Summer got out, I took them to Brangus for dinner. I had a pretty awful steak, which was both overcooked and somehow cold to the touch. The girls enjoyed it, so I didn’t press. I just don’t think they’re any good for a dinner on a slow day.

I tried to take them out for dessert when we left, but they didn’t want to go. Instead, Summer and I had a beer on the back porch before I took Muad’Dib out for a run. We took a big plastic bag from Eaddie’s vacuum-sealed couch, and then came back home. As we got back, I heard the familiar frustrated cries of a man trying to recall a stubborn dog. I was proud to be able to call Muad’Dib back out of the house to run and fetch him, and then deliver him back across the street.

Not bad for a Thursday.

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RESET ALL THE THINGS

We were a little behind today, but I had time to get things ready for our staff meeting. I felt like I did okay, and then I spent the entire day working on the Aiphone gate stuff. At one point, David and I walked out to the front gate and looked at the control box out there. All of that stuff was Avigilon, but it was still useful to tinker with it a bit.

I had an anxiety attack about half an hour before I left to meet Summer at Ortega’s for lunch. Then I finally perceived some luck in the afternoon. I ended up factory resetting both the master controller on Heaven’s desk, as well as the relay control module. I really thought I had something, but by the end of the day, Heaven’s phone still couldn’t call the stations.

We left a little late, and made it home just moments before Summer pulled in. She took a cool bath, and I finally made it to Leonard’s to pick up an air filter. The house took forever to cool down, but I wasn’t sure if it was from the away temperature being high, or if it’s just been running non-stop and couldn’t keep up.

Muad’Dib could have handled the store a little better, but he was excited about a new place. He was super high energy all evening, so I took him on a late run straight to my parents’ house before it got too dark. He ran nearly the entire way there and back, which was pretty intense for how miserable it was outside.

We made it home and I juggled chargers, since Summer made it home with under 10%. Fortunately I charged extra last night, so I had a little more than usual when we got home. I rummaged through the freezer and found some buns that I could use to make a sandwich for tomorrow, and then wound down for bed pretty quickly as the air finally started to feel a little cooler.

Enter Enter Enter Enter Enter Enter Enter

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It’s a Machine

My shower wasn’t great with a messed up diverter this morning, but it could have been worse. It was still better than a hotel shower by a huge margin. We got to work, and things were again pretty quiet. I spent a large part of the morning troubleshooting a weird Start Menu issue where it keeps reverting back to category view. I found several articles mentioning group policy, but I couldn’t find anything similar that would have affected it in Intune.

I took a really late lunch and ended up at Wendy’s for a spicy chicken sandwich in a Minions & Monsters meal. For some reason they felt the need to serve it to me piecemeal, so I got my Frosty first. Then I got fries. Finally, my sandwich was delivered to my table. I guess at least the food was fresh?

The afternoon went by fairly quickly just because I ate so late. I had a sudden anxiety attack that didn’t linger too long, and then we made it home. Eaddie had received my Steam Machine that Johnny let me order, so I had been looking forward to opening that.

Summer got home shortly after I did, and I unboxed my new computer while she showered. I had to tinker with my home theater again, because for some reason there was no sound coming out of the subwoofer. Once I got everything set up, Summer decided she wanted Taco Villa for dinner, so Muad’Dib and I went to pick that up.

We ate, and then she went to bed. I cleaned all the stuff out of my car so I can leave it at the body shop, and made it to bed on time.

Now what?

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Low Down Dirty Dogs

I started a batch of cold brew yesterday before I left work, so I was excited to start the day with that and some cold foam. It turned out pretty well, but I forgot to fill my cup with ice before I left the house. It also didn’t take very long for me to find out the lid leaked, so I had a wet shirt for most of the morning.

It was a much quieter day, so I just kept chugging away at different little problems. I did get a couple of calls from Tesla just before lunch time. I had emailed the service manager at Tulsa last night, and apparently there was a new one in training that called me first. He said he was going to make sure I got a loaner, and reached out to the service manager in Little Rock. Then I got a call from him, assuring me that they would work something out.

I brought the last of the roast for lunch, but I couldn’t finish it because it was so much liquid and rice left over. I also started with another leftover salad from the weekend crew, so it was a decently good lunch. Teisha stopped me when I went down to visit the microwave, and said a couple of the guys in the plant wanted the dogs to stay out of the breakroom because that’s where they eat. Of course that was no problem at all for us because they’re well within their right to ask for that, but I did kind of have to laugh at the fact that I can’t lean up against any surface in that room for fear of getting my clothes dirty.

The afternoon went by a little slowly and I had an anxiety attack that left me exhausted again, but we made it through. The drive home wasn’t too bad, and we arrived to find Summer cleaning a huge section of the kitchen. Then she cleaned up some fresh veggies to make cold sandwiches and chips for lunch, which was really good.

It was still early and hot, but I took Muad’Dib for his best run since the fourth, and we visited with Dad for a bit. Then we ran a trimmed route the rest of the way home, but still more than he’d run all week. Summer and I finished thee penultimate episode of Funny AF, followed by most of Jeff Arcuri’s special. We gave up early so we could get to bed on time. She said Eaddie went to Clarksville to work, and wouldn’t be home, so it was just a quiet night after that.

Don’t ruin it for everyone!