Tag: depression

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Swing, Swing, Swing

I went to bed super late and woke up when Summer made her coffee so I wouldn’t waste the day. We spent some time with the dog, and then she went to the gym while I tried to clean things up a bit. Suzanne and her godmother came over to return the old turtle tank I gave her, but I ended up telling her to just sell it and keep the money rather than let me put it into storage since I still have two large tanks that are unused.

Eaddie went out with Eli for an Easter service, and Summer and I eventually made it to the Neighborhood Market to get stuff to make salads and spaghetti for dinner. When we got home, I continued cleaning while she cooked. Then I took Muad’Dib out for a good run and returned Dad’s sledgehammer. I felt like that extra weight made my feet hurt on the Onewheel even more than usual.

The kids got home and we all sat down to eat a really great spaghetti dinner, and everything turned out really great. Summer cleaned up afterward, as I dealt with some minor aggravations. Later on, Eaddie went to chat with Summer in bed for a while, then came to talk to me as well. We ended up going to sit in the living room and had a great talk for a couple of hours until I started trying to fall asleep.

I should have known from the start.

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Death and Taxes

Summer was basically attached to me all night, but the one time she wasn’t, she awoke in a panic and screamed for me, which jarred me awake. We made it through the night though, and I made her a latte when we got up. She went to the gym and wanted to come home to do yard work while I picked up around the house. She got stuff to make a slow cooker gumbo for dinner, I did a bunch of Vine reviews, and then I took Muad’Dib out for a slightly early run.

He wasn’t running super fast, but he came up behind me and touched the back of my legs, which scared me into thinking I was running over him, and I wiped out. The only damaged appeared to be a bruised left heel, which hurt the rest of the evening. We visited my parents, who were getting ready to go to the movies, but The Chosen was evidently sold out by the time they got there.

We made it home and I started working on my taxes until dinner was ready. Eli came over and the four of us had a great meal, then I went back to taxes. My Amazon Vine income has caused some confusion, because evidently I can claim that as a part of a business for some deductions, but Cash App Taxes seemed to input a Qualified Business Income number out of nowhere. I didn’t want to be up too late trying to learn tax law, so it would have to wait for the next day.

Well I can’t quit procrastinating now!

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The Umpire Strikes Back

I had a belly ache for most of the day after eating two buffets yesterday. I got to work and everyone was already burned out for the week. I actually tried being a little productive at first, with a cup of black coffee to get things moving. Just as I finished that, Randy announced that he was going to Burns Park to watch some autistic kids play softball, and invited me along.

I welcomed the change of scenery, and we drove out to the park to check things out. Jim was out there helping. The sun was shining and the wind was blowing, which caused some of the sand to kick up into the air. It was still a beautiful day to be outside, and we watched as they finished up their activity day.

We were a little early to get to lunch, so Randy drove me around the whole park, which was pretty neat. Then we slowly made it across town to Brewski’s where we met Maggie, Kyle, Jay, Corey, and Hunter. I thought I’d get out cheap by splitting some wings with Maggie, but what she ordered ended up being well over $20. I should have just stuck to myself. I was still stuffed, but the wings were pretty good.

The afternoon was pretty dull back at the office. I walked out a few minutes early so I could get home to Muad’Dib. I really wanted to take him to the lake and then get him a bath so he could come inside. Summer was supposed to go, but was an hour late getting home, and said she was tired and in pain. Ben called me while I was outside with Muad’Dib, so we talked for a while. Then I ended up just taking him out for our normal run, and he did much better than yesterday. I think he just needed a day to recover. We stopped at the basin and I raked out a bunch of the hair he was losing.

My parents weren’t home, so we continued on toward home where we crossed paths with Tasha, her husband, and baby who were all out walking their tiny dog. I stopped to chat with her for a little while, then made it home for the night. Summer was laid out on the couch, so I sat down with her and tried to watch the Netflix Kill Tony episode, but it was pretty awful. Then I put on Resident Alien and got a few laughs. She was done after that. Eaddie was out pretty late with Eli, but I caught a glimpse as she made it home just before I went to bed.

So let us stop talkin’ falsely now.

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Heavy Stuff

Muad’Dib ended up staying inside again last night, and he tore up some stuff in the living room. I stepped on a wet spot, but it turned out to be a cup of water someone left in the sunroom. One of the stuffed cows lost an eye, and he completely destroyed the 3D-printed heart gears that I had made. Other than that, it was just some packing material I had saved.

I was a little worried I was going to be late to work, but I had a tailwind and got there just a little after seven. It wasn’t very long before we had to run to the high school because FedEx showed up unannounced to deliver three big, heavy pallets of Chromebooks. Jim took Randy and me over to help move them, but we really didn’t need to be there. The truck driver fussed about making it to the loading dock, and showed up with a bit of an attitude after Maggie had called his supervisor. He did fine, so I don’t know what all of that was about.

I met with Randy and Kyle a little later in the afternoon to talk about some of the new cybersecurity guidelines we have to follow. We had a Tacos 4 Life bar from Genesis for lunch, and it was cool that they actually had the chafing dishes to keep the food warm. After that, they sent everyone home due to some incoming storms.

Randy let me go particularly early since storms were coming from my direction. It never really got bad for us though. It rained heavily for a bit, and we had some thunder and lightning. I hurriedly ran with Muad’Dib just as it started to sprinkle. We saw Dad briefly and then made it home. Summer was there and we went to the Neighborhood Market to pick up a couple things for dinner.

Eaddie got home just as we did, and we went outside to play with Muad’Dib for a bit and listen to the rain. Eaddie had a band thing scheduled, so I drove her to Tech only to find that it had been cancelled because they had no power. We had a good chat during the drive though, and it makes me so happy to hear how emotionally intelligent and smart she is.

When we got back, I sat by the tub with Summer so we could talk for a while. Then she got up and fried some potatoes and onions while I got the grill going with some premade burger patties and corn. It was a good, quick dinner and Muad’Dib sat under the table so calmly to accept scraps. Then everyone went to bed pretty quickly after that.

Naders are comin’!

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What Is

I got very little sleep last night, but made it to work at a “normally” late time. It was not a day for accomplishments. I went to McDonald’s with Randy for some breakfast and had a steak, egg, and cheese bagel. That got me through to a late lunch with him and Jim at Louisiana Famous Fried Chicken just up the road. They liked their food pretty well, but my jambalaya was poured over rice that simply wasn’t cooked.

I guess the afternoon went by pretty quickly. I charged a little extra last night so I wouldn’t have to stop on the way home now that my free Supercharging is expired. I took Muad’Dib out for a run and did two laps of our usual course while I took a phone call

Completely out of the blue, Shawna sent me a friend request over the weekend, so I entertained her message, fully expecting to be phished or scammed in some way. To my absolute surprise, it really was her, so we had been catching up since Sunday. I think in hindsight, that conversation went fairly predictably. Then, again by chance, I got a call from Johnny and I talked to him for a bit as we made our way to my parents’ house to see Dad, who had gone out for a flight with Julie since she earned her next step in her licensure.

We made it home for the night and I brushed him out. I desperately wanted to take him for a bath so he could stay inside for the night, but we dawdled too long and didn’t make it. I threw myself a pity party and reminisced as I gathered myself for bed.

What Should Never Be

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Curb Your Enthusiasm

I was super late for work today because somebody went off the road just after Menifee. We were dead-stopped for several minutes, and as I finally approached the scene of the accident, there was dirt all over the road. I was so late that I decided to stop in Conway to charge back up to 80% so I wouldn’t be stuck doing it after work, and could drive straight home. Traffic was stop-and-go after Conway too, so I was just over an hour late in total.

There wasn’t much going on in the office. I mostly fought Jim’s laptop that wouldn’t image, and I figured it was a drive failure since I could image anything else. There was still some leftover Corky’s “BBQ” in the fridge, so I eventually just ate a bunch of that at my desk for lunch.

It was rainy all day, but mostly dry by quitting time. I worked a little bit late to make up for being late, and then made it home to run the dogs. I thought they had gone missing earlier in the day, but Summer said they were still in the yard. Normally they come running when they hear me on the cameras, but not so this afternoon. They had a good run with me though. I was a little worried about Muad’Dib because he hadn’t eaten the last three or so meals Summer had given him. He didn’t care for his little bone treats either. He still pooped a little, and he didn’t have a problem with his hot dog, so I messed with his new slow feeder. I think he may have been bothered by the raised portions, because once I lowered them and made it easier for him to eat, he finished his whole bowl.

The girls made tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, but I wasn’t very hungry and just skipped it entirely. I felt a bit bothered most of the evening, so it was a quiet night until bedtime.

All Filler

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Division of Duties

It rained all day today, and the latest version of FSD won’t let me just step on the accelerator for an unlimited amount of time any more to keep it moving along at higher speeds. That meant I had to drive for a few miles until things got a little less foggy and misty. I was a little bit late, but Randy was still at the conference and Kyle didn’t come by the office in the morning.

Jim and Jay came in and were going to help me hang a TV, but Jim ended up having to pick up Maggie because she was dropping her husband’s truck off for a tint job. Jay and I got the old TV down, but the screws for the new TV were too big to fit into the holes on the old mount, so we were stuck again. I don’t know why the whole move has been such a priority, but the secretary called Maggie again to check on a timeline, and we were later asked to write up a statement about the whole ordeal.

I met Kyle at David’s Burgers for lunch in the rain, and they were pretty good but slow for how many people were in the kitchen. I don’t love their fries, but I love that they’re unlimited if you can ever catch someone with a fresh bowl. I do like the seasoning on their burgers, but every time I ask for “all of the extras” they just give me the typical burger build instead of the jalapeños, grilled onions, and everything else.

The afternoon dragged on a bit. Randy showed up after the conference and we all caught up. I had been bouncing between tasks all day, but my biggest accomplishment was shrinking my SQL database so the drive would no longer be completely full.

I had to stop and charge on the way home due to the rain, but I ended up getting a leg cramp and wanted to get out to stretch anyway. Luckily it wasn’t raining and I paced the parking lot for a bit, then got back in and made it home. Summer had dinner ready and we ate some kind of weird orange glazed hamburger meat and green beans over rice. It was sort of “Hamburger Helper Meets the Far East.” It was alright, but I think it would have been far better on chicken.

Eaddie was helping at a swim meet, so the two of us just had dinner and a calm evening together since she wasn’t stressed from work and I didn’t run the dogs in the wet. Then it was a slightly earlier night to bed.

Who’s responsible for this???

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Don’t Break Anything

I got out a little earlier today and had a slower drive in to work to save some battery power. I could have made it home on the charge, but I still ended up supercharging on the way home anyway.

Randy was out at a conference, so it was just Maggie and me all day. She was in better spirits after her friend passed yesterday. Randy emailed us some things to do, but it seemed like those weren’t entirely our job to do. It’s confusing what we’re actually responsible for because the district is so overstaffed. We personally handled much more at both of my previous districts. On top of that, people kept knocking at the door all day, pulling me away from whatever I was avoiding.

I actually didn’t even take a lunch, but Maggie made me eat her leftovers. I can never tell if she’s just worried about me being hungry or if she’s just genuinely not hungry enough to finish her food. It’s a pretty regular occurrence for her to have leftovers, so I try not to feel guilty about eating stuff she gives me. I thought I’d leave a little early because I never left, but I only got out about ten minutes early.

I stopped in Conway to charge a bit just so I wouldn’t have to shuffle cars late at night. Then I got home and ran the dogs to the Ridgewood Brothers to see if I could catch Robert. I actually saw Grant, and he seemed to be doing a little bit better. I think their whole situation has probably just gotten to the point where you throw up and then start to feel a little bit better.

We got rained on a bit as we made our way back across town. Just as it started to sprinkle, we encountered Hannah driving the opposite direction. She stopped to chat and we caught up for a little bit before we continued on to my parents’ house. By then it had started to rain pretty hard, so my leg was soaked by the time we got home. The dogs were good though, so they got hot dogs before dinner.

Someone had brought a bunch of Vine packages in for me, so I sorted all of that before Summer got home. The morning went by fast, the afternoon went by slowly, and then the evening flew by. Summer had a bad day at work, and I think we’re both feeling pretty unsatisfied in general. We chatted for a bit before she went to bed. Eaddie got home late and went straight to her room, and then I crashed as quickly as I could.

You broke it.

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Bummers

Traffic was pretty bad on the way in this morning, but I got there. Randy was early again, and we all sat and chatted for a while in the morning. Maggie was stressing out due to something happening with a friend or family, so she ended up taking the afternoon off. I tried to help Jim with some stuff over the phone and was mostly successful, and Randy was in his executive team meeting all morning.

Lunch came a little late, and I met Kyle, Jim, Randy, and Jay at Brewski’s for their version of Taco Tuesday. I remembered thinking their burger was okay last time, but it was still bar food. I was even less impressed with their tacos, so I’ll never order those again. Everything was incredibly dry. Even the limes fell apart into pulp when we squeezed them. I actually ended up stopping at McDonald’s on the way back to get some fries, which were actually pretty good since I went to the one on McCain this time.

Sometime in the afternoon, Greg stopped by our office and for some reason wanted a tour of our shop area. I had a feeling someone put him up to it, but eventually Randy came back inside and said I couldn’t charge my car in there any more. That’s a pretty big bummer, especially in the winter, and it may be the straw that prompted the camel to update his resumé. It’s all about minimizing my time away from home, and if a few pennies worth of electricity is going to keep me away any longer, then it’s just not going to be sustainable for me.

I got home without any trouble and took the dogs out for a run. They weren’t great, so they didn’t get any treats when we got home, and I cut down their dinner a little as well. Muad’Dib hadn’t been eating some of his meals anyway.

I took care of some large Vine stuff before Summer got home, and she didn’t have a great day at work either. Then I had to fire off a message to the clinic because I was completely out of amlodipine for the next morning. Luckily they phoned it in to Walgreens and I was able to pick it up just a few minutes before they closed.

After I got back home, Dad said Uncle Tuan wasn’t doing great, so it looks like we’ll be going to visit. I don’t really know what happened to him for the past several years, but I know I’ll have a very different memory of him than what we’ll find, and he likely won’t remember me at all.

No Win Tuesday

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Long Day for What

I remember waking up frequently after a whole lot of dreams, but I couldn’t remember anything about them. I finally got out of bed around eight, long before anyone else. I tinkered with the Vine Helper notifications a bit, and then had a bit of anxiety as the item drops started flowing. I got meds sorted for the week and the girls got up and around. Summer went to the gym for a while, and Eaddie hid in her room all day.

I took a shower and then took the dogs out for a really early run, which was good because it started to rain after that. Summer said she wanted a steak and baked potato for dinner, but then didn’t press it when it started to rain. I ended up going out to pick up some Panda Express instead, since I had a BOGO coupon, and then we watched The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent with some popcorn. I actually thought it was a pretty fun movie, and it was great to see Nick Cage back – not that he went anywhere.

Nothing.