Tag: frustration

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Catastrophic Failure

We slept many hours. Summer, as usual, had many more than me. I woke up first, but we got out of bed around the same time. Power flickered overnight, so I had to start my computer up again. Shortly after I got it back up, power flickered again and I ended up losing all of my Tabs Outliner history. That extension has been critical for any projects I’ve had to research, so I spent literally the entire day trying to recover from that.

Summer made brunch for us out of some sausage and eggs we had in the refrigerator. Eaddie left. A new shower head was delivered, so I got that installed. I spent more time trying to recovery my Tabs Outliner, but eventually gave up and rolled back to my last good backup over a month ago. By that time, I needed to take Muad’Dib out for a run. I also wanted to have a good dinner, so I took the Pint X to my parents’ house and warmed up the leftover fish soup while my parents were out watering the plants.

Afterward we rode straight back home. I never could get the Pint over 10mph, which seemed strange. I guess I never really felt pushback, but it just felt like it wasn’t accelerating any further, and I didn’t want to nosedive. It didn’t help that it wouldn’t even make it straight up the driveway without nosediving.

When we got back in, I happened to notice that Summer put some parts of the coffee maker into the dishwasher that weren’t dishwasher safe. I didn’t feel like I blew up at her, but I still had to dig things out of the running dishwasher and clean up the mess. Two components were plainly labeled as not dishwasher-safe. She also left a pretty obvious sticker in place, so that came off in the wash. All of that ultimately lead to a small fight, and I simply couldn’t understand how she could possibly feel like she had any kind of argument.

It’s always simple, stupid stuff, but I don’t know how much more I can stand. I feel like my life was on a steady upward climb before I met her. I was moving upward with my career, and I was cleaning up my home. I let my own home suffer when I started spending most of my time with her at her house. I saw things in her life that I felt like we could improve as a team. Then I allowed the whirlwind of storm damage to my home, my desire to expand my property, and Bác Vân’s unexpected death to push me to move into a new home with her. It’s been an absolute freefall from that point forward. I can’t get any traction on any project, I’m constantly frustrated or angry, I don’t feel like I’m respected, and the only thing I can do to provide any happiness for myself is actively making everyone else unhappy.

Maybe I’ll figure it out tomorrow.

Why am I here?

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Hi Bixby

I could barely sleep all night, between the uncomfortable bed, differences in my travel CPAP, the hot room, and the bright lights coming through the windows. I laid in bed for a long while, unable to go to sleep, so I think I only got a couple hours of actual sleep. I got up and showered, then went downstairs with Summer to let Muad’Dib relieve himself. Then we took him back up to the kids before going down for breakfast. I was really pleased with their selection, but frustrated that the kids just wanted to sleep instead of coming down to eat, and then just complained about hunger later.

We checked out and headed to 181 Ranch in Bixby for the Conquer the Gauntlet. It was pretty overcast, but I couldn’t tell if it was actually going to rain or not. Summer wanted me to pay to be a spectator, so after waiting for them to finally start, Muad’Dib and I wandered into the field between obstacles and waited for them to come around. I took a few pictures, but there wasn’t just a whole lot of interest. It wasn’t terribly hot, but it was humid and gross feeling. We waited for a while, then went back to the car for a bit while they went out farther than I cared to go.

Muad’Dib did great, and got lots of attention from strangers. We eventually went back out and found our crew as they finished up the last few obstacles. I actually thought they had another loop, but they were actually on the home stretch, so we didn’t get to see them finish. It actually started to rain pretty hard, so we ran back to the car and just waited for them to get back.

The kids wanted nothing but Red Lobster after that, which I hated, because there were so many more exotic things we could have tried. There wasn’t really much around us either, so I drove us through Muskogee on the way home to find the Red Lobster there. We missed a turn out in the farmlands, but got headed back in the right direction. We charged just as we got into town, then made our way to Red Lobster. As we got close, it looked completely dark and there were zero cars around the place, so I continued on toward home. The kids had been chanting “Red Lobster” repeatedly, intentionally annoyingly, and I didn’t have self-driving and had to actually pay attention to what we were doing, so I shut them down and continued driving toward home.

After some back and forth, I agreed to drive them way out of the way to get to the Red Lobster in Fort Smith. Our server was incredible, so at least I had a full plate of shrimp in front of me at all times. We ate, then stopped in Ozark for one last charge before making it home.

I had been communicating with a lady about a Onewheel Pint X she had on Facebook Marketplace, and agreed to meet her once we got back into town to buy it. Then Summer informed me that her debit card had been compromised, and she hadn’t gone to get a new one yet. I started worrying about figuring out my own ATM situation since I no longer do any local banking, but the lady said Cash App would be fine.

As soon as we got home, the others unloaded and I took Muad’Dib to meet the family at Kroger. I had previously offered $700 out of the $750 she asked for, but after I paid her, I learned that her son was trying to save up for a dirt bike. With a heart full of approval and knowing what it’s like to want a motorcycle, I sent her $20 more for the cause. I let their son ride my GT-S around the parking lot to see how it felt, then loaded up and headed back home with our new Pint X in “Honda Grom Blue.”

Muad’Dib had been telling me the entire time that he really wanted to go for a run, so we did a short loop to my parents’ house, then back home before dark. Summer had wound down for bed while Eaddie was out and back, presumably fetching cars with Eli or something. I had a bunch of inefficiently packaged Vine products to unbox, but I also finally got my new Pixel 11 Pro. I got the screen protector installed, but didn’t bother going any further than that before bed.

Don’t fight it!

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Lessen Learned

I woke up in the middle of the night with a charley horse in my left leg, eventually got back to sleep, and then woke up to my alarm and another charley horse starting in my right leg. I was able to walk it off fairly quickly, then got ready for work. I kept thinking we had a call in the morning, but Tammy reminded me it was for tomorrow. I was all out of sorts, but eventually got into my tablet project again. I finally went down and showed Marivic, then took it back upstairs to tinker some more.

I met Summer at Ortega’s on her way to Little Rock, and they sat us way in the back. Not long after, Joel, David, and Shane walked in and sat at a table beside us. I didn’t overstuff myself, and had a better afternoon for it. Later, Shane came by to talk to me just briefly, and then it was super quiet the rest of the day.

When I got home, I had a strangely lumpy package to unbox. Inside was a poorly packaged box of nearly the same size, full of glass bottles of soda. A surprising few of them were smashed, but I still had to take them all apart to clean up the broken glass. Eaddie got home in the middle of that, and then Summer arrived just as I finished.

Summer was basically in the bathroom until she went to bed. Eaddie left, so I made myself a chicken sandwich and then took Muad’Dib for a run. We did most of our regular route, but he cut us short a couple blocks. It didn’t feel terrible, but it was still very hot, and he was tired. I aired up my tire at my parents’ house because I forgot to do it before we left the house. Then we got back home just after dark. I cleaned up where Eaddie had left a bunch of sugary dishes out to collect more ants, and got to bed.

Tired of oopsies.

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Oh Brew Hoo

I got up to a banh bao this morning, made a cup of coffee, and then nearly immediately knocked the full mug over, spilling hot, black coffee all over my desk in the worst place possible. My stack of old phones, flash drives, card readers, the front of my computer, a stack of paper receipts got the first wave. Then the coffee flowed down between the glass and the frame of my desk, getting all over my home theater receiver, both of my laptops, tablets, my subwoofer, and eventually the carpet.

I still wanted to grill chicken to eat with croissants and pesto, so I mopped up what I could all morning. Then Summer and I went to the Neighborhood Market for some chicken breasts, thighs, and a cart full of chips. I started grilling when we got back, but I went too lean on charcoal. Summer took Muad’Dib for a walk at Bona Dea while I added more charcoal and got the chicken cooked.

My parents came over with some more basil, garlic, and limes to make more pesto. Eaddie left to hang out with friends, and then Summer and I ate when she got back. The sandwiches were incredible, and felt so light and fresh. I wanted more, but I just got back to cleaning up instead.

I eventually got my computer put back together, and my receiver seemed to be unaffected. I tried to shift things around a little bit, but the most important parts made it back to their usual places. Eaddie eventually came back home with dyed hair, so I made her a sandwich and then cleaned up the kitchen. The whole day was burned, but at least the dishes were done.

That’s one way to clean a desk.

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Infinite War

Summer went all-in on wanting the kids to come watch a movie with her today, so that meant we had a bunch of cleaning to do. I cleaned up the kitchen while she went to the gym. Eaddie went to play flute at somebody’s church, and then we got the living room cleaned up before going to the Neighborhood Market.

Summer really wanted to make a charcuterie board, but I just wanted to get the stuff I needed to make pesto before Mom’s basil went bad. With no plans for an actual meal, I got hungry and irritated, so I grabbed some sushi that was marked down and we made it back home. Summer started on her board while I took Muad’Dib on a run to my parents’ house to trade some croissants for a lime and garlic.

When we got back, I just stayed out of the way rather than risk further irritation. Summer got pigs in blankets, and eventually the kids came out to watch Infinity War. It was a good time, but the evening went quickly and I never got any real food. As everyone else settled down for bed, I made the pesto without knowing what to expect.

I knew I’d had pesto on things before, but never really paid much attention to it specifically. The recipe and prep was incredibly simple though, and I’d always wanted to try it. Mom already cut the basil up, so I just had to throw it into a blender with some other goodies. Since I didn’t really have an expectation, I brought Eaddie in to help tune the flavor, and we ended up with something pretty good. I figured sitting overnight would help everything meld as well.

Always outnumbered.

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Document It

I had been hopeful after recovering from the weekend, but I had a fairly predictably bad start this morning. I got out late, but made up the time. Luckily I had a banh bao I could take for breakfast. I picked at a couple things, but got pulled away before I could focus too much on my tablet project. Having grown quickly in volume but not staff, we’ve lacked the enterprise level documentation that I’m used to even at a public school district. Joel asked me a question that turned into another project, so I tried to let ChatGPT handle the legwork on that one.

Late lunch was a pretzel pub burger from Wendy’s. I tried to go a bit light in volume though. Our UPS driver was sat staring at the wall in the corner, so I went to sit by him and then realized he was on the phone the whole time after trying to talk to him. After that, I sat quietly staring out the window, at Muad’Dib, who was staring right back through my car window at me.

I got back into my tablet after lunch, but had middling success. Part of the problem was that my phone number was tied up in my account at my last job, but luckily Randy was able to clean that up for me. That seems like an oversight by Microsoft, but so many things are.

We left a little late, expecting dinner with Summer. She had been making a really big deal for a couple days about wanting to cook dinner since she would be home a few hours early. As soon as I walked in, I thanked her for cooking the broccoli that was starting to go bad. Then I realized I had accidentally sat on a Wendy’s chili hot sauce packet in my back pocket. That got all over my pants, and at least a bit into my car seat, so I had to clean all of that up before we could eat.

After all the fuss, dinner was a precooked fried rice from the frozen food section, along with some kind of Mongolian beef and shrimp that had been stewing in sweet juices. The rice was cold and mushy, and I didn’t understand getting frozen instead of just making fresh. Of course my questions just lead to a fight that I had predicted days earlier, and was a large part of why I didn’t want her to cook in the first place.

Summer went to the TV, and I took care of my packages before taking out the trash and recycling. By then it was getting dark, so I took Muad’Dib for a quick run to my parents’ house, and then a short bit around the Promenade. We didn’t have time for much else, because I needed sleep.

The hard way ’round.

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Full

I grabbed my leftover burrito from the fridge and we hit the road this morning. As soon as we got out of the car, Muad’Dib bolted out of the parking lot and out of the gate after something. I never saw it, but luckily he turned around and came back in before the gate shut him out. Everyone was there today, but I was still left to myself all day. I got distracted by a couple other tasks, but my main one was still Android management.

Summer had to leave early for her meeting, so we had a really early lunch. Our usual server is the only person I’ve ever met that gets even close to as excited as Muad’Dib gets when he sees me. He had our drinks at the table just seconds after we sat down, and then asked me, wide-eyed, if I wanted him to make my plate. Truth be told, I knew what I wanted, but I couldn’t turn him down. Moments later, he brought me a chicken taco salad, chili relleno, and a tamale and chili con queso, all with extra beef and cheese poured all over it. It was a lot.

We were in and out pretty quickly, but then it was a long afternoon with indigestion. I had some success with my tablet, but got caught up with some more Microsoft account nonsense. I ended up leaving pretty late, and then got caught behind some dummies on the way home.

Summer cleaned up, but then had some typical stomach reactions. I started to take Muad’Dib to my parents’ house, but had a flat about a third of the way there. We walked back so I could put some air in my tire, and then made it over to find them watering plants outside. It was getting late, so I microwaved some curry that still wasn’t hot from the stove, ate, and then headed home.

Summer was in and out of bed for a bit while I got my things ready for work in the morning, and then I finally made it to bed.

Reset

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Back to Trash

I wasn’t sure how today would go, but it started a little slow. I still didn’t want to start back on iron since I didn’t trust my stomach, but things started out okay. We ended up going by Shipley’s for a deal, and then Taco John’s for a different deal. I had a burrito on the drive in, then snacked on a donut later in the morning. It was super quiet upstairs because Janice was out, but I saw the other three a couple times. It was mostly Muad’Dib and me alone for most of the day though.

We took a late break to burn some points at McDonald’s before they expired, and then finished up the afternoon alone. It was slow getting back into tablet policies, but I really think working with the computer policies helped me get a grasp on Intune as a whole, and now I’ll be in a better position to implement this.

Summer worked late, so we stopped to see her on the way home. Then Dad called while I unboxed some things at home. He had the number of someone looking for a Fiero, and also wanted to try and get the Murano fixed up.

I cleaned up some more until Summer came home, and then we ate the healthiest thing I’d had all day for dinner – some fresh broccoli and ranch. I didn’t feel great the rest of the evening, but it was the normal kind of not great.

Summer cleaned up and I took Muad’Dib for a run to my parents’ house. Dad was out watering plants while Mom was inside, but then she came out and they were still split between the front and back, so I helped Mom in the back yard until he came back to help. Then Muad’Dib and I headed back home for a quick evening to bed.

Bleh!

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One for Many

Summer woke up wanting donuts, so I got up with her and we went to Shipley’s for a pretty large order. Unfortunately, it wasn’t one of my better experiences. The filled donuts barely had anything in them, and they gave me a sausage croissant instead of bacon like I asked. Eaddie never even got out of bed until mid-afternoon, so her stuff sat out untouched. Summer was cycling and had gone fully bird-brained, and then got upset about it. I tried to help by cleaning the kitchen, which upset her further, so she left for the gym.

I got a lot reorganized and did the dishes while she stayed gone a while. Her phone case came in, so I got that put together. When she got back, I stopped her for a talk before she had a shower. Then she worked on her laptop the rest of the afternoon. I ate the KFC she brought me the other day and then took a shower, but started to feel pretty sick to the stomach again. Eaddie left for a while, then came back briefly before leaving again. I ate some more rice and shredded pork, hoping it would settle my stomach a bit for the evening.

Muad’Dib was feeling pretty cooped up all day, so I took him for a walk up the cul-de-sac and back. Of course he wanted more, but I was already looking toward bed. Somehow Summer still made it there before me, but I went down a couple hours early.

Children!

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Migrants

I got a slightly early, but rough start this morning to try and get ahead of any migration issues. I was pretty disappointed in the level of support from Aptean. It really felt like we just weren’t a priority for them, as we’d often be waiting several minutes for a response on anything. We had way more issues than I expected, and no real answers. Between that and some technical issues with my new onboarding, i was a busy bee. I ended up skipping my Soylent for a late coffee, and then skipping lunch for a beef stick because I was so caught up between issues. Luckily we all had a break for birthday cake in the afternoon, and then the rest of the day flew by.

Summer got home just after I did, but just wanted to split leftovers for dinner. I was super hungry, but it was nice out, so I thought I’d take Muad’Dib for an early run and then make it back for dinner. Summer bathed while I ran Muad’Dib to the Neighborhood Market to drop off some recycling. Then we went to my parents’ house to pick up some rice.

Mom was going to heat up some phở for dinner, so I ended up eating there. Then we made it home before dark and tried to clean up a bit before bed. Ants were back in Muad’Dib’s food bowl, and Summer got mad when I told her not to just wipe them away with Lysol. She pouted to bed, so I got back to my routine so I could get there myself.

African or European servers?