Tag: frustration

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Out of Nerves

I fell asleep late, but surprisingly woke up fairly early. Summer got up for coffee, and I made us a couple more sandwiches. I thought it would be a good, productive day, but Summer almost immediately started irritating me by being loudly obtuse. I just had to walk away before my inside thoughts got too mean, but of course that upset her too. I thought she left for the gym, but she actually just quietly started cleaning the laundry room, and rearranging everything in there. I walked out of my office and the house was cold because she had the door wide open while she was doing that.

Things just got worse all day long, as I struggled to make sense of how she had compacted everything. I didn’t really get anything accomplished except for the cooking of some old food that needed to be consumed. I started the turkey carcass in the Instant Pot, and boiled the liver and leftover broccoli stems for Muad’Dib.

Dad called and needed to borrow a carpet cleaner, and somewhere along the way, the handheld one got a damaged charge port. I blamed Summer because she had just moved it in her cleaning, but that upset her too. Dad had to bring it back and swap for the upright carpet cleaner. I took Muad’Dib for an early run while the sun was up, and then spent the rest of the evening finishing up the turkey broth and beans. It wasn’t anything like the soup I wanted to make, and it was more beans than soup, but it was edible, and it got junk out of the fridge and turned it into something that everyone will have to eat.

no improvement

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Worst Best Case Scenario

I felt pretty awful all day. It was rainy, and I thought food might help, so we picked up some Burger King and shared the hash rounds on the drive in. I didn’t eat the biscuit until nearly lunch time, so then I took a really late lunch. I felt overwhelmed with new projects most of the day, and I just couldn’t finish any one of them.

Things were quiet by quitting time, and it was a relaxing drive home. We walked in and found a bunch of standing water in the laundry room, and I feared the worst. There was no time to waste though, so I turned off the water lines to the washing machine, changed clothes, and took Muad’Dib on a run.

When we got back to the house, I had to take a little break until Summer got home. Then I started excavating the laundry room. It kept looking dry under the washer, so I went the other direction and finally found the source. We had kept some spring water from Hot Springs, and rats chewed into the bags, causing them to leak all over everything. Now I’ve got to find where they’re getting in and patch that, plus I still have to replace the garbage disposal.

I took a break and played some Don’t Starve on my phone in the dark living room by myself. I died, and finally decided to try it on the Steam Deck again for the next round. It was getting late, so I laid with Muad’Dib and Summer in bed for a little while before getting up and getting ready for bed myself.

488

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No Resolutions

I had a tough time getting up for work this morning and got out of the house late, but still made it in without any trouble. The old server must have died from a power issue or something, because Heaven caught me right off the bat with an internet issue. I just need to get them off of the old domain controller.

The rest of the day was fairly focused on cleaning up the user directory for the menial task of unified email signatures. Organization on the front end would have made this a two click fix, but that is not the way of things. I had an anxiety attack somewhere along the way and contemplated tracking dates and times for those.

I had sort of been planning to go to Arby’s sometime this week, and today seemed as good a day as any. They were packed, but I found a table to eat. Joel came by in the afternoon to tell me they were cutting everyone loose at 2:30.

Eaddie was making Oreo balls with Eli when we got back to the house. Summer came home and took a bath while I took Muad’Dib on a run. I wanted to take him to PetSmart, but by the time Summer got ready and we made it to the store, they were closing up for the night. We went to Point Remove instead, and played cards over some pizza.

The kids were gone to a party when we got back to the house. I gave Muad’Dib a good bath before we went to see my parents. Mom was asleep the whole time, but we had some sparkling wine with Dad. We visited for a short while before going back to the house where the kids finished the series finale of Stranger Things. Summer went to bed and I finished the essentials.

Perpetuity

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Turbo Husk

The wind was still howling this morning, and it was freezing cold, but dry. The office was surprisingly quiet again, which made it difficult to get motivated. Further reading of Microsoft documentation didn’t help. I tried to pep myself up with a cup of coffee from my new portable press, but it was awful. I’ll just have to brew larger cups of those old grounds at home, and use them up.

I had an anxiety attack at some point, but I don’t recall whether it was before or after lunch. We went to McDonald’s and Sonic so Muad’Dib could have a little snack with me. I thought he’d want to run more after lunch, but he was ready to go inside. The afternoon dragged on forever until quitting time.

Eaddie was supposed to make lasagna for the second day in a row, but texted earlier to say she wasn’t going to do that. Summer had called earlier as well, to say the Murano’s power steering was going out. I was frustrated at the lack of proactive maintenance and the fact that Eaddie still hadn’t found the Pathfinder keys that she lost.

We got to the house and took a quick run, but the cold wasn’t quite as sharp. Muad’Dib took off like a rocket, and I was too hesitant on the board to try and keep up with him, but he was doing well over 20 miles an hour. We visited Dad briefly before making it back to the house. The girls got into a frustrating argument in which Eaddie got onto Summer for “having an attitude with her all day.” She and I had a talk later about how I didn’t like the connotations of that word, and I think it helped. I eventually had some leftover turkey before laying down with Muad’Dib for a little while. Summer joined us after her bath, and we quickly flipped through some Netflix as Muad’Dib started snoring heavily.

I dawdled for quite a while before joining them.

Notes on Notes on Numbers

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Spring Holiday

I slept a little later than I intended, but had plenty of time to get the turkey on the smoker. We had time for some coffee and presents, and a game of Phase 10 Tiles. I managed to get some blisters on my right hand trying to chop up some wood for the smoker, and then ended up putting the disc in whole since it just barely fit. I was worried the charcoal would jam it, and it did later on. I took Muad’Dib on a run to my parent’s house for some honey, and then rode back with an instant read thermometer for Dad. On the way back, the Onewheel died on me, so Summer had to come pick us up.

I smoked the turkey and the ham, and had to dislodge the wood to keep the fire going. I had accidentally started the turkey about 100º too hot, so I dropped that down after basically reverse-searing it. The ham probably could have gone on earlier too, but they all finished right on time for me to get the turkey sliced up.

Eaddie, Eli, and Ceci were watching Stranger Things all day, but came along for dinner. We got to the airport just in time to eat, and Kevin had a bunch of family there along with our group. I didn’t feel too bad, because Julie had to run home for something too.

Dinner was a little fragmented, and we didn’t really have a clearly defined dinner and dessert time. Dad did some magic, and then flamed the plumb pudding. The alcohol didn’t all burn off though, so it tasted a bit boozy with the PGA. I chased it down with some of Julie’s over-rich chocolate cake.

The kids kept wanting to go home early, but we made them stay a while before cutting out. Then I was in a rush to get out so we could settle down for bed and work in the morning.

But now I’m sunny with a high of 75

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Let’s Table It for Now

Summer got up and made us a simple sausage and egg breakfast with toast. I started cleaning up the dining table so we would have room for cookies, and did that all through the afternoon. I tried my best not to just hide things away somewhere else, and put stuff where it actually needed to go. Eaddie left to have Christmas with Eli’s family, and Summer made some homemade dog biscuits, followed by cookies for us to decorate.

I eventually had a shower and took Muad’Dib for a run. Mom made duck soup, so I ate with them before everyone came over to decorate cookies. Noah showed up much later than he told us, and Eaddie followed. Dad came over a little after I got back, and we got to the cookies.

Dad left after we got tired of decorating cookies, and then Eaddie had Summer open up one of her presents. It was Phase 10 Tiles, which was a take on the original, except with little plastic tiles instead of cards. We played a few rounds of that, but Noah couldn’t wrap his head around the gameplay and we ended up quitting halfway through.

Noah and the girls opened presents after that, and it wasn’t long before Summer was ready for bed. Muad’Dib seemed pretty tired too. Eaddie took Noah somewhere, and then it was off to sleep.

It was like Christmas all year long.

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Hammer and Chisel

I got up this morning and actually got showered fairly early. Eaddie had the community concert in the evening, and Summer wanted to do some shopping. I wanted to take Muad’Dib, so we went to PetSmart first to pick up some more food. Then we put him in the car while we quickly poked our heads into Belk. They didn’t have what we wanted, so we drove over to JCPenney. From there, I got Muad’Dib out and we walked up the strip. Summer stopped at Shoe Carnival, and then we walked a little further up before returning to the car.

We were pretty hungry by then, and I was actually hungry enough to eat Italian, so we tried to stop at Italian Garden. Muad’Dib got super whiney, so we let him out to run a bit first. That was my mistake, because I should have had Summer queue us first. By the time we got in the door, she said there were a few people waiting. They quoted her ten minutes, but we decided to leave. I made a quick pass downtown to see if the taco place down there was open, but they weren’t. Feeling my frustration steadily growing, I took us to the house and warmed up some pizza and other leftovers.

Summer went to the gym and I started chipping away at the dining room table. I got a little bit of stuff moved, but there was just so much to put away properly. Summer eventually made it back, and I took Muad’Dib for a run while it was a little warmer out. Mom made curry, but it wasn’t ready when Muad’Dib ran us straight there. We continued around our reverse route for a while and then turned around just a couple blocks from our house to go back to my parents’.

I ate and then we started rolling back to the house. I got to the end of the road when my board threw a charge error again, but I was able to limp it most of the way home. I did carry it for about a block total, mostly just to make it up the hills. By then it was about time to get ready for the concert. We put Muad’Dib out back and then picked up Dad, and made our way to Witherspoon.

We sat near the back with Eli’s family, and Salvadore talked to me until we finally sat down. Summer wanted to sit by Shaana, so Dad and I just sat at the end of the aisle. The music was pretty typical for a Christmas concert. On the way out, Summer had us walk all the way around the building to avoid Gerald, which seemed a bit ironic considering the heat I’ve gotten for wanting to avoid Autumn lately.

We dropped Dad off and then got back to the house so I could give Muad’Dib a bath. He did wonderfully, and even stayed in the tub for me while I fetched the blow dryer. I gave him a good vacuuming afterward and pulled off a bunch of hair. Then it was a rush to bed.

Payout for tricks!

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Blue Da Ba Dee

Summer and I got up early so we could get to Little Rock for her race. The organizers waited until the last possible minute to post the actual location, so we got stressed when we arrived at Allsopp Park and didn’t see a crowd. Summer had me make a block, but we came back and saw a few cars at the top of a hill. That ended up being the race, but it was small and informal, without any real prizes or anything. They had nachos, beer, and Fireball, and the race path was not at all paved. In fact, they had to explain symbols, marked in flour in the dirt, so that people would know where to go or when they were off course.

They finally kicked off the race and people disappeared around a corner, and I drove down the hill to Beignets & Brew for coffee and a snack. The beignets were hot and fresh, so I ordered a few more to take to Summer when she finished. It wasn’t even a full 5k, but she seemed to enjoy it. They had an assortment of trophies, probably picked up from a junk store, and basically handed them out at random. They even tried to call me up for being the partner of the best looking runner from Russellville. We had some nachos, and left shortly thereafter.

Our next stop was Park Plaza to do a little looking around. Summer picked up a couple of things, and then we continued to Gus’s World Famous Fried Chicken. I impressed her with my perfect parallel parking after she sassed me about having the car do it. I think I actually executed it better and faster anyway. We split half of a chicken and some extra sides, and everything was delicious. I just wished the chicken was bigger. Then we made our way across town to the IMAX.

We got there just in time to get situated, but I had to swap my glasses due to some wicked glare I couldn’t get rid of. Avatar: Fire and Ash was a spectacle, to be sure. It was an enjoyable, long movie. I barely remembered The Way of Water, but I wasn’t terribly worried about keeping up with the lore anyway. We were entertained.

After the movie, we went straight home except for a stop in Blackwell. Summer wanted to get some wine for Shaana, and I picked up three more kegs of Fireball that were on clearance for less than the price of two bottles, so that was a pretty great deal. I don’t know why they were clearing them so close to New Year’s Eve, because that seems like prime time for that stuff. I grabbed a dozen tamales from the food truck outside when we left, and the girls really enjoyed those when we got back to the house.

I spent too much time dawdling after that, in spite of feeling pretty exhausted. Tomorrow will be a busy day of cleaning up, and it will only get more stressful from there.

She’s crazy!

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Gumball

We finally had our staff meeting this morning, and I did my best to represent well. Afterward, we had a pretty boring call with more of the same from Aptean. It always feels like a sales call, promising more from their future plans. I bounced around a lot after that.

We took a really late lunch and I had my McRib. Then the afternoon was a bit slow and quiet. Summer had her company Christmas party, so we got back into town and I picked up some Taco John’s to eat before going.

I dressed Muad’Dib up in his ugly sweater and antler headpiece, and we went to attend at the lube. Summer was like a nervouos teen, hoping all of her friends would show up, and I just felt bad. Muad’Dib got a decent amount of attention, and then Summer made me play Dirty Santa with them, so I stole a gag gift to give out at my own Christmas party.

I was feeling pretty melancholy afterward, so I decided to take Muad’Dib to PetSmart again. They would be closing within minutes, so instead we stopped in the parking lot so he could go to the bathroom. Then we kind of cruised aimlessly toward home. I set the car to “chill” and let it go, without a destination. As we approached our side of town, a cop pulled behind me and lit me up. We pulled into the hospital parking lot where he informed me that my tags had expired. That didn’t make a lot of sense to me, but sure enough, they were. He let me go with a verbal warning, and I headed toward the house.

I didn’t notice, but after I walked in, Summer stopped to warn me that Autumn was there with Eaddie. It wasn’t until afterward that I noticed her text asking what I was doing and why I was avoiding coming home. It was completely loaded, because she could have sent a warning first. I immediately put my shoes back on and walked out with Muad’Dib, but she stopped me in the garage to express her own frustration at me as I trembled.

I let Muad’Dib take me for a walk through almost our entire route in reverse. We stopped at the basin and sat on a bench for a while to knock on the sky and listen to the sound. A stiff breeze came in as we eventually made our way back to the house and found our way to bed.

Unexpected, in the middle of a walking path.

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Undust

Eaddie went to Little Rock with Eli’s family today, so Summer and I spent the day cleaning and resetting the living room. I finally had a path to get to my plants again, so I took care of all of those, then cleaned and dusted things as they came back into the living room. I couldn’t believe the TV didn’t take any real damage. It looked like the frame might have been slightly bent where it came down and hit the center channel speaker below it, chipping the wood slightly in the process. Otherwise, the corner that took the full weight of the ceiling drywall appeared fine.

After Summer finished at the gym, we set up a couple outdoor Christmas tree lights. Then I took Muad’Dib out for an early run. I was super hungry when we got back, and Summer agreed that Chinese sounded great, so we went to New China. Muad’Dib was mad at me for making him sit in the car and pouted a bit when we got back.

I couldn’t find my lalst few speaker wires all day, but finally found them behind some of Summer’s stuff in the bedroom, so I was able to get the home theater set back up before bed. Everything seemed to be working great as far as I could tell.

Finally, if not a win, at least a reset.