Hey Google, tell me about my day.

On the way to work this morning, I passed a guy on an ill-fitting bicycle that looked like he rode it straight out of a game of Grand Theft Auto, windbreaker and all. I’m talking about oneĀ of the older games, not GTA5 Online. I say that because he didn’t have bags of money raining down on him as he rode around giving a piggyback ride to a guy with a green mohawk. You see, that was a joke, because GTA5 Online is broken from all the “hackers” and cheaters. I’ll be here all week. Don’t forget to tip your waitress.

This evening, in a perfect example of my inability to complete simple tasks without getting distracted, I set out to repair a leaky flapper valve in one of my toilet tanks. After a couple hours, I found I had recovered and cleaned up a lost herb planter from my garage and planted a stalk of celery to grow in my windowsill.

It wasn’t until I returned to find the toilet in a state of disrepair that I realized what I had done. There is no help for me. Save yourself.

Otherwise, today can easily fade away in time, completely forgotten.

Alexa, goodnight.

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