Tag: anxiety

I went to bed really early, but it was still a really rough night of tossing and turning. I went in to the office and mostly stayed quiet in my room, trying to solve the puzzles they pay me to solve. Tammy sent me to the main office to set up a scanner, and I happened to catch up to Gary on the walk over. He lent a hand, and then chatted with me about the witch hunt on the way back to the shop.

Zach had been out of the office most of the morning, but came back for lunch. He, Gary, and I went to Foodies, which was tasty but extremely slow to present our meals. Zach had never been, so it was a nice change to try something different.

In the afternoon, I finally got around to talking to Thomas about what happened on Monday, and he seemed upset that I didn’t specifically incriminate myself in writing. I just explained to him that I didn’t see any other way out of it, and that this kind of documentation is never going to be used to benefit me. I sent the email, and then worked out the day as productively as I could.

After work, I stopped for a cold and windy car wash before going by Superfast to visit Summer. Then I stopped by her wash to vacuum out my car. I thought I’d go by my parents’ house, but never made it. Instead, I backed up some videos from Sentry Mode on my car and tried to relax at home.

Summer had a meeting at the ATCC that ran a bit late, but I met her up at her house when she finished. We ate some leftovers, and then I had already taken care of most of my nightly tasks, so it was easy to get to bed.

If you’re going to believe every off-the-cuff remark I make, your mother’s got some explaining to do.

I was a couple minutes late to work, but I walked in with Gary, which lightened the concern. The shop seemed super quiet with Zach out, and everyone else out at their own buildings. It’s super slow everywhere, but I think everyone’s just hiding out in their newly assigned buildings. I had a CPPC meeting in the morning that went without incident. We were still missing two of the administrative members, but at least Justin was there for No Shave November. I convinced one other person to abstain from the calendar vote, since it actually made no difference to any of the classified staff.

On the way out, there was a white Model X parked right in front of the building, blocking the wheelchair ramp and handicapped space. I went to Dwight to drop off a cable, and it was still there when I got back, but I don’t have a clue who was driving it.

Josh met Thomas, Gary, and me at Popeye’s for lunch. They were packed inside, but got the chicken out to us relatively quickly. I actually went with the bone-in chicken since it looked really plump compared to their usual tiny pieces. I’m not sure I got spicy, but it was still good. I wished I had gotten some hot sauce, but they didn’t have any condiments at all out in the dining area and I didn’t feel like going back up to talk to any of the employees, who appeared to be stressed out enough.

After lunch, I tinkered and wrote my meeting minutes, and ran around the campus a bit more. At one point I went back to Dwight again, and stopped at the new Ridgewood Brothers building on the way back. Robert was there with one of their guys, and gave me a quick 30-second tour of the place. He had literally just gotten the news that the fire marshal wouldn’t let them fit four smokers in the smokehouse, which was upsetting after they approved the blueprints. I left them to get back to work, but I wasn’t super productive for most of the afternoon.

I did everything I could to avoid a crash, including sip on some black coffee until quitting time. When I finally left work, I drove to the Arvest across town to see Aaron. He didn’t notice that I had gotten out of a new car, but clocked out for the day to come see it once he realized what it was. I let him drive it to Spices to pick up his food, and he had the best reaction so far. When we got back to the bank, he said he would check on getting my cash to me in the morning. I stopped by my parents’ house on the way home and talked to Dad about the termite inspection I’ll be getting tomorrow. After that, my imagination left me stressing pretty hard about how much damage they’re likely to find tomorrow.

I went home to try and clean up a bit to make the walls a bit more accessible. While I messed around with that, I started a load of laundry to clean up the bedroom, since I hadn’t slept there in weeks. I kept getting super frustrated with things, and ended up staying in the rest of the night just to decompress.

…and now I just sit in silence.