Should I Stay or Should I Go

I did not expect today to go the way that it did.

Shortly after I got to work, I had Zach pick me up from Clear View Auto Glass and Tint, where I dropped my Model 3 off to get the windows tinted. I took the opportunity to try out valet mode, which seemed straightforward enough. It was neat getting notifications when my car was unlocked while I was at work.

After that, I was stuck in the office without a vehicle, so I spent most of the day helping others. I finally fixed something for Jeff, for real this time. Unfortunately I didn’t have the same luck with Adobe for Jacob. That was when things got weird.

Brody called, acting all cloak-and-dagger, and wanted to know if I was serious about wanting to go to Clarksville. I’d been interested, at the very least, but I had never put much serious thought into it. Evidently Ryan is coming back to fill Josh’s slot, and I hadn’t even considered how that would shift the teams around.

I went to lunch with the Big Three, and Gary asked if I had talked to Brody lately. I figured the gig was up, but everyone was acting like nothing was going on, so I just played it off. After lunch was a different story. Gary came into my office, shut the door, and asked me again. Then he shared that Ryan would be coming back, obviously onto the Engineering team, and that Thomas required that only two people could remain on that team. I couldn’t really tell what any of their thoughts were on how the dynamic of that team might improve or worsen, based on what Gary would tell me. He just indicated that there were very differing opinions.

About that time, I got a call that my car was done, so Zach took me back to get it. We chatted a bit on the way, and when we got back I quickly did some math, and wasn’t immediately thrust into comfort with the idea of leaving. Things have been rocky with the latest regime, but I hadn’t taken any serious measures to leave. A raise would be nice, but to be at the cost of drive time and vehicle wear made it less appealing. It also wasn’t particularly clear why I would have to report an answer back, other than to make them feel better about who they would send back to the Operations team.

Gary and I chatted a bit more after work, and then I went home briefly before having to pick up Eaddie from robotics. Ben called shortly after I arrived at home, and we talked for quite a while as I retrieved Eaddie. That conversation kind of served to reassure me that the ball was in my court, but I’ve never been good at taking advantages I’d been given.

I took Eaddie on home and helped her with homework while texting Brody to get a better idea of the environment. The hours would be shorter in spite of what the contracts read. I’d like to hear what Ryan has to say about the place, but an equal part of me would simply enjoy working with him again. I feel like I could learn a lot more just by being around him. In contrast, I would be at the top of the ladder with Brody, without peers. I’d have more control, but also no structure or guidance, or even anyone useful to bounce ideas off of. I would be diving in, head-first, hoping to swim.

More math is required, but I think I have a magic number. Even then, there are still too many other variables I need to understand. Time doesn’t seem to be on my side.

If I go, there will be trouble, and if I stay it could be double!

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